Friends: A New Perspective?

Why is it, especially in our Indian community do men and women 'hide' the friendship they share with the opposite gender? Why can't a married man or a married woman be good friends with another male or a female?


I personally think it's really difficult to be friends with the opposite sex like one is with girl friend. You can be best friends with a guy if he is gay or you have already had an affair with him and now for you he is another woman. Once I was in animated conversation with a guy married to a friend. In the middle I had this strong desire to touch him so I flicked an imaginary speck from his nose. It's too volatile being friends with the opposite sex be ready to be scathed!


This thing is mostly observed in small towns. In cosmopolitan cities men mostly have women as their close friends and it's quite evident so they try not to hide it. Also, both the genders expect the other gender to be okay about it. You cannot expect the mentality to change overnight. Slowly small town will also adapt to this change. It'll take time but eventually it will.


There are many happily married men and women with good friends of the opposite sex that I know of. It's only when one of the spouses develop an insecurity in their own relationship with their partner that the problem rises. This leads to 'hiding' such friendships, basically to avoid unnecessary misunderstandings and scenes at home. If we are able to maintain a good, loving and mutually respectful relationship with our spouses, friends of opposite sexes poses no problem.


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