I was a nerd with specs and hair tightly secured in a ponytail. There was nothing in me that would gravitate a tall, dark and super handsome 17-year-old dude to me. I would gawk at him like an idiot while he flirted with the ‘it’ girls in school. They had their skirts stitched 3 inches above the knee giving all the reasons to him for spending time and interest on them. I was a 15-year-old contending my mom for waxing my legs and threading my eyebrows. I had already spent one year eyeing him strolling the school balcony or standing outside the class for not doing his homework. I never got to share that punishment with him because I was programmed to sit with my homework every evening at 5 pm. I spent one more year glancing at his charm, silently while he enjoyed all the attention the girls with short skirts and poor grades showered on him. I knew I would never see him again, when I somehow summoned the guts to walk up to him and bid a goodbye on the farewell all teary eyed.
It’s been 15 years, but I still remember that date and time to the second. I had lived these 15 years of my life picturing what it would have been like, had I worn a shorter skirt at school and waxed my legs, every now and then.
But things will be different from today. Thanks to social media he found me, and I found him. And my first reaction while going through his current pictures and updates was – Seriously? What the hell was I even thinking? No, he is not a cool dude with awesome hair anymore. He is just an average Indian man in his mid-thirties with hair thinning out and belly swelling up. Had he met me today, he wouldn’t have stood a chance with this super-hot diva in a hot dress that I have remolded myself into. But dismissing a man for his appearance is not very seemingly of me. What actually woke me from my prolonged slumber was a 15 minutes chat – the guy thought I was pretty, beyond he could have ever imagined me to be – yes, I missed a beat when he said I was pretty –he always knew I nurtured a liking for him – I was mortified – then he spilled, he was engaged – I felt something burning my heart – he suggested we should catch up sometime soon, we can go on a casual date may be, he thought I was hot, knew I was mad about him, we should “hook-up”, casual sex you know, it’s okay these days, everyone is into it.
WHAT????? This is the man I honored as my first love? A guy who is getting married in 2 months, wants to ‘hook-up’ with me? Yes, casual sex is the ‘in’ thing these days. But I am not ‘in’ for it. I still belong to the old school of thoughts. For me sleeping around when you are engaged to someone is deception. It was a 15 minute-chat that dethroned a love of 15 years. But from today, I will have a better sleep. And yes, one more thing that will help me sleep better is the discovery that those ‘hot’ babes are fat, undergraduate, college drop-out - housewives, while I, with all my degrees have a designated chair for me in a major multinational and a handsome salary rolling into my account every month.