We all love the beginning of relationships when we can’t keep our hands off each other. Everything feels good. Even the things we would usually hate don’t seem to bother us anymore. Love is in the air and you feel good to have someone that loves you back. You feel that your life couldn’t get any better.
We are talking about the honeymoon period.
What is a honeymoon period in a relationship?
A honeymoon period is the starting phase of relationships when you begin to get to know each other. You are so much in love that everything looks like a dream. You are the happiest person on earth and think that you have the perfect partner. Even the possibly irritating habits of your partner seem to look cute. You laugh at his jokes even though they are lame. Both of you are lost in each other’s thoughts. You could not be more in love.
This is naturally the period when you look and feel your best. You and your partner seem to like the same things, and agree on everything. You like to text each other many times a day and never forget to surprise each other with gifts. Such a bliss life is!
After some time, you start getting comfortable with each other and all lovey-dovey things take a backseat. You are often spotted without make-up and he can be seen lounging around in his boxers.
15 signs that your honeymoon period is over and you need to get real
The honeymoon period usually ranges from six months to one and a half years depending on the relationship. There comes a time when you feel like you have done all that you wanted to do with your partner and there is nothing new. You feel bored, and you also feel like you know your partner inside out and there is no rush to seem him/her anymore because he/she is always around. So when do you realise that your honeymoon period is over? When does reality come in to sabotage your fairy tale? Here are 15 signs that tell you that your honeymoon period is now over.
1. You don’t call each other that much
There was a time when you both couldn’t do without talking to each other. Even if you didn’t have anything to talk about, having him on the other side of the phone was more than enough. At times you both would even fall asleep while having late-night conversations. The frequency of those calls has now reduced significantly. You both go without talking to each other for hours and neither of you has a problem with that.
2. The excitement has gone
The butterflies that would flutter in your stomach earlier have now disappeared. The combination of thrill, excitement, and nervousness that you would feel before isn’t there anymore. You do, of course, feel happy when you see him, but it doesn’t feel the way it used to. Seeing him has become a normal part of your routine now.
Related reading: 13 non-sexual touches to feel intimate and close
3. You don’t spend much time together
During the first few months, there was always this longing and desperation to meet again. You both could not wait to meet each other the next day. You would do everything together so that you could spend maximum time with each other. Now that things have normalised, you have gone back to your individual lives and have been able to build your routine around your partner. Meeting on a daily basis isn’t necessary anymore. You make plans when you both are free to meet up.
4. You can be yourself around each other
Gone are the days where you would dress to impress. You freely roam around wearing sweats in front of him. The ‘no makeup days’ seem to keep increasing. He sees the ‘ugly’ you and still has a smile on his face. You both don’t care about doing embarrassing things in front of each other. Your partner gets to know your bad habits and fetishes and you don’t get all red when they are revealed to him. It is when you both fall in love with each other’s real self and not the first impressions.
5. You’ve had your first fight
Everything was going so well when your first fight spoils it all. It is reality knocking at your relationship’s door saying that your honeymoon period is over. You both get into a heated argument with both your egos clashing. There are other emotions taking over in your relationship, which is also important for you both to see how you handle it when everything is not all roses.
6. Those ‘cute’ habits are now annoying
The habits that you might have initially liked or thought to be cute are now annoying you. Those heightened feelings have now worn out and you see things more clearly. Those lame jokes don’t make you laugh anymore. You instead tell your partner that they are lame. You start to notice his bad habits and start to doubt your judgement regarding him.
7. Your relationship has lost its spark
Things between you and your partner have now cooled down. The spark that you had has now gone. All that sexual tension that was drawing you both like magnets has vanished. You start to feel like a married couple that doesn’t have sex. Seeing new couples cuddling each other makes you jealous. You have become the girlfriend that eyes other happier couples.
8. There are less fancy dates
The number of dates in fancy restaurants has now decreased. You both have become comfortable around each other and don’t mind staying in and watching a movie. It is because you do not need to bother about keeping up your impression about each other anymore. Staying in is as good as going to a fancy restaurant. You have come to a point where the place doesn’t matter anymore, but the person does.
Related reading: Here is why both scheduled and spontaneous sessions are a must
9. You sometimes get bored
Your partner doesn’t seem interesting anymore. You have even finished the list of interesting things to do together. Now that you know each other inside out, you have run out of things to talk about. You forcibly try to keep the conversation going even when there is not much to talk about. His presence doesn’t excite you anymore and you feel like hanging out with other people, too.
10. Your PDA reduces
Your public display of affection too reduces. You don’t kiss or hug each other as frequently as you used to. You both, who loved holding hands all the time, aren’t doing it that often. This is because you have now got used to each other’s presence and touch. You both are starting to focus on things that are beyond just the physical aspects of your relationship.
11. The little things have now stopped
Those little surprises that you would give your partner have now stopped. You no more show any thoughtful gestures. This is because a part of you feels that because you don’t need to impress your partner anymore, so you can do without the little things.
The little things always matter, no matter at what stage the relationship is in. Don’t stop doing them.
12. Sex has now become regular
The heat in your relationship has turned cold and so has your sex life. Gone are the days where you both couldn’t get out of bed. You now don’t feel like trying new stuff or practicing new techniques. Your sex life too isn’t as active as it was before. Regular sex is enough and you no more feel the need to experiment with it. Sex is the door to emotional intimacy. Always keep it heated.
Related reading: 10 activities to spice up things with your partner today!
13. You don’t need to fake it anymore
There is no need to pretend to be someone else anymore. You both behave like yourself without the fear of what the other might think. You feel light that you don’t need to be this other likeable person in front of your partner. You can openly talk about your likes, dislikes and fears without having your partner judge you. You are finally in a real relationship.
14. Your emotional baggage can now be opened
Everyone has their own emotional baggage. You don’t want to reveal your emotional baggage in front of your partner too soon, as it could scare him away. When you start revealing your inner self and expose your naked truths to him, it is then that you are ready to show him who you really are. You are no more afraid to show your emotions in front of him.
15. You miss your ‘me time’
No matter how amazing your boyfriend is, spending too much time with him is going to tire you. Doing so many things together will make you miss your ‘me time’. You will miss how it was to be single and will want to spend some time focussing on yourself and your hobbies. Your boyfriend too will want to get together with his friends for an occasional beer.
There is no need to fear that your honeymoon period is over. A honeymoon period is a fantasy. It is when it gets over that you actually get to know what an actual relationship feels like. Your relationship is put to the test several times and how you overcome it is what matters. Now that your honeymoon period is over, you might find that your relationship isn’t as exciting as before. Though the rush and excitement might not be there, there is love prevailing over lust.
Excitement and chemistry can always be revived, but love, care and understanding are the foundation of a relationship that lasts longer than the honeymoon period.
Such a well researched list ! loved reading this.