Pucker up, ladies and gents. It’s International Kissing Day and it’s time to put those sloppy kisses to rest. With my pro tips on how to kiss like a boss, we are going to turn you from a face licker (or tongue stabber) to a complete kissing dreamboat.
However, before we turn our attention to becoming a master of the make-out, we must give credit to the genius behind International Kissing Day. After all, despite what the moral police say, kissing is a significant part of social bonding between friends with pecks, parents, and children with embraces and amongst lovers with intimacy. So, in the words of Enrique Iglesias-Could, I have this kiss forever?
Identify the kissing red lights– Do you know what I hate more than an uninvited guest at home? An uninvited guest in my mouth. Some men (and even women) don’t understand the traffic signals of intimacy and that makes them not only a terrible kisser but also a terrible romantic partner in general, IMO. Before you start kissing someone, please gauge their intimacy interest in you.
If you suck at eye contact or staring at someone’s lips to mark your intent, then simply ask. Don’t just leap at them like a hungry hyena.
Yup, I am talking to you Karan, Akshay and Arjun- buy a car and read this manual thoroughly.
Keep it fresh- If all those Patanjali commercials with Baba Ramdev (half naked) have not convinced you to invest in good dental hygiene then let International Kissing Day try. Nothing is a worst turnoff than bad breath. Oh, and before you go on about how I am just reiterating the basics (and that you brush your teeth twice a day), don’t tell me you don’t love a good Blenders Pride with garlic fries and a fag on your night out. That stuff stinks when you are picking up a girl and wondering why she didn’t call you back, bro.
Remember, breath mints are your best friends and condoms are your cousins.
Close your eyes, open your lips- Once upon a time, when I had my first kiss with the prince of my dreams who’d kiss with eyes open and looked like a total frog. Do me a favour, avoid being that toad and close those eyes. Let a girl imagine she is with Ryan Gosling and quit the awkwardness of eye contact mid-embrace. The only thing you want to keep open through the whole process of kissing are your lips. Use them to ease into your kiss while mimicking the comfort level of your partner. If you are one of those macho men, who get off on the domination, then only dominate with a gentle butt grab or a slight face hold. No choking please, this is not an audition for the WWE.
Related reading: Why lust is important to understand love
Thou shall not release the tongue- Unless of course he or she does so first. With kissing, like most things in life, less is more. From caressing the nape of someone’s neck to massaging their back are all forms of acceptable stimulation when locking lips. But the moment you get that tongue out or do a vampire bite, I am ghosting your ass. Let’s play with subtle teasing, sensual kissing and setting the pace as to how your partner likes it. You just sit there, or stand against the wall, and enjoy the kissing ride.
Simple, eh? Then what are you waiting for? Celebrate International Kissing Day with your Enrique Iglesias or Whitney Huston out there, and have this kiss forever.