You only get one chance to impress that date
Whoever said that first impressions matter a lot, could not have imagined how true their words would one day be. These days, when dates are but a right swipe away and someone doesn’t need to be the friend of a friend of a friend to have a chance to take you out, such impressions have become even more important. One blind date or Tinder match making game can decide whether or not things are going to go forward. Both the people involved go into it intrigued and with absolutely no idea what they are going to face. It is just as easy to delight as it is to dismay. Which is why it is important to bring our best form to the game.
One of the first things to take care of is to not unwittingly say or do something obnoxious. A lot of us have some really bad dating habits we are not quite aware of and these are the things that seem to keep the relationships from moving forward. So, just in case you have a date coming up and you really want it to work out, here’s a list of bad habits that you should get rid of before you meet your would-be bae.
Related reading: 25 dating tips for introverts
You know you have met one of them when they cannot stop talking about how much money they earn and how successful they are. They just won’t shut up and let you talk. All they try to establish is what a good catch they are. If you are one of these people, please reconsider spewing all that information and letting the person in front of you speak. I am pretty sure they are interested in you. That is why they agreed to go out with you, after all. But if they were just interested in how much money you make, they would have just requested your salary account details and asked you to shut up. So talk about the more interesting things in life. Your hobbies, motivation, life, death, God and atoms. And give them space to talk too.
Wait, let me finish!
Everybody appreciates a good listener. I am pretty sure you do too. So if you just refuse to listen to them and impatiently wait for them to finish so you can start speaking again, it’s really off putting for the person facing you. Listen well. Encourage them to talk. Make intelligent remarks and don’t interrupt. Soon, they might open up and you will find yourself at the start of a beautiful and healthy relationship.
As important as it is to listen and give them space, it is equally important to interact and communicate. Silence has often been called golden but not in such cases. If they are the only one talking, they might either think you are bored or might find you boring themselves. You date to know each other better. So, while you get to know them, also let them see you. Communication, after all, is the key to all good relationships.
Communication, after all, is the key to all good relationships.
If you’re guilty of this, there’s a chance your dates never seem to work out. There is a very fine line between sweetness and being downright creepy. Be polite and ready to please but try not to bend over backwards in the process. If they wanted someone without a spine, they would have gone for a jellyfish instead of you. So be courteous but confident. Be you. Don’t flatter. Laugh at their jokes but don’t overdo it.
Again, this is someone we have met. They seem so ready to protect and take care of us that we start wondering if they are seeing us or a 5-year-old drooling child. If this is you, stop. Offering to pay the bill is nice but don’t force it if someone wants to go halves.
Offering to pay the bill is nice but don’t force it if someone wants to go halves.
Don’t treat your date like a damsel in distress. Be respectful and kind. But don’t act like they need to be babied. That might come later in the relationship, but in the beginning it seems disrespectful.
Don’t be a creep
Don’t stalk. Don’t get obsessed. Don’t call or message them continuously after the date. Don’t fawn over them either. Just don’t. Obsession is creepy and even if the date goes well, they might not be willing to continue the relationship with you.
Don’t act like someone you are not
Dress well, but don’t overdo it. They came to see you, not India’s top model. Behave like you normally do. Don’t try to oversell yourself. If you act like someone you are not, even if the date goes well, they will realise you were pretending, sooner or later. Avoid that mess and just be yourself.
The dating scene is pretty hard these days. No one has time to offer you more than one chance. If you mess up once, it is done and there is no going back. So instead of dating one person after another and wondering why it never seems to work out, try changing all of these bad dating habits and sooner or later you may just find The One. Till then, good luck. And happy right swiping.