Sleepless nights, months of nausea and vomiting, cleaning poop and changing diapers and then add to that a non-existent social life. Having a baby means all these and more travails. So you might wonder why do people still eagerly want to have a baby? How do they find beautiful reasons to have kids?
- Fact one, they do because despite reading all the books and online material available on parenting they do not know what actually hits them till the baby pops out.
- Fact two, there are times you want nothing else more than a baby. Yes it’s true some parents have admitted that after marriage, career and socializing they came to a point in their lives when they wanted nothing more than to hold a baby in their arms.
There are some people who become accidentally pregnant but most usually plan their pregnancy and have a baby when they are ready for one. They start a family when they have good reasons to have kids. What are those reasons?
12 Beautiful Reasons To Have Kids
Apart from the need to shower their love on their offspring people have extremely logical reasons to have children. But the reasons to have kids are logical, sensible and beautiful as well. In India usually the reasons for having a child are still a bit different but the reasons are sensible nevertheless. We jot down 12 reasons here.
1. Holding a baby is the happiest thing
Those who have held a baby for the first time in their arms will vouch for this reason. There comes a time in a couple’s life that they want to hold a baby made from their own flesh and blood and love it with all their heart.
Sushantika Misra, a computer professional, had a baby after 10 years of marriage. She decided to delay having a baby because she wanted to concentrate on her career first. “But when my son was placed on my chest after he was born and then they handed him over to me for breastfeeding it’s very hard to explain the gush of emotions I felt in my heart. Feeling that was reason enough to have a kid,” she said.
2. You pass on your genes
Ritwik Ray, a journalist, was 45 and happily single when he suddenly felt that his family genes would die with him. “It’s a feeling that makes you very emotional and I felt directionless. That’s when I got married,” he said.
Ritwik is not the only one who feels this way. There are plenty of people who want to pass on the genes to the next generation and there is satisfaction in that. This is one of the most less discussed but real reasons to have kids.
3. A child cements a relationship
It’s a myth a child saves a dying marriage but it is also true a child brings out the best in a couple. To take your relationship many steps forward is a good enough reason to have a child. It’s a logical reason too to have an addition in the family to feel whole and fulfilled.
A couple discovers anew their own relationship after a baby is born and the child pushes them to become better working as a team. The way a couple handles a new baby dividing sleep and waking hours and food and poop times, says a lot about how they function together. They discover their own capabilities with the arrival of a new baby.
4. Reason to have a kid is to look forward to the future
Deciding to have a baby has a lot to do with how you look at your future. The whole process of a baby growing up into a toddler and then a teenager and then going off to college makes you look forward to the future. The child growing up in your arms stepping into the world one day, all on his own armed with the knowledge and training given by you, is a heady feeling.
A child is indeed a reason to look forward to the future.
5. A reason to have sex
You have tried all the positions, gone through a lot of porn, had all the best sexcations, have tried it outdoor and tapped every inch of the house for some exciting spots, now what? Having a baby is great reason to have sex. You have a purpose apart from the orgasm to have sex and trust us that purpose is exhilarating. When those two blue lines show at the end of a month on the preg kit that sense of purpose becomes more fulfilling, more reinforced. The reason to have a child is connected to a reason to have more sex.
6. Finding a new life
If you are bored of your present life – the same group of friends, same parties and same gossip and political debates – trust us your baby will give you a new life and new friends too. Anushka Mitra, a school teacher, who left her job after having a baby found a whole new world bonding with new moms like her, at her day care, play school and with the moms in her building, sharing tips and tricks on parenting.
“It was a whole new phase in my life as I created new friendships. They really understood me because we had common problems and were dealing with challenges of parenting. My kid has grown up but we are still great friends. I found a whole new social circle through my daughter,” said Anushka.
7. A reason for a conversation
After a few years of marriage when you have debated enough about politics and philosophy, binge watched Netflix and had devoured bottles of wine still then the conversation refuses to flow after a point of time.
After a baby the conversation is kickstarted again although it revolves around nappies and formula but it’s a whole new conversation that progresses as the baby grows and the conversation becomes extremely enjoyable with every first thing achieved by the baby. This is one of the best reasons to have a child actually.
8. You embark on a journey of self rediscovery
A philosopher once said motherhood changes you completely forever. You cannot look at another child again without a smile on your face. Most mothers would say this has happened to them. Truly!
When you become a parent you would get to look at yourself in a new light. You would know the endless love your heart could fit in, to what extent you can go to make the sacrifices and how all the things, that were so important to you even yesterday becomes unimportant overnight. Deciding to have a baby is one thing but once it’s arrived the child becomes a reason to be a better person.
9. You want to experience unconditional love
Unconditional love is the most beautiful thing in the world and it can be shard only with a child. The child does not love with a motive or agenda, the love comes naturally. The same happens for you.
Your love for your child is not what you feel towards anyone else. Experiencing this love is reason enough to have a child of your own.
10. To fix past mistakes
You could have grown up in an abusive home or have had toxic parents. You want to right that wrong and you want to have a child and give them a far better life. Correct the wrong of your parents and get your closure. Not the most logical reason but a reason enough to have kids.
11. You want to know what parenting really is
You are always reading about parenting in magazines, websites and blogs and now you have come to a phase in your life when you want to know what parenting really means. You want to know what this talk is all about. Perfect logic to have a baby.
12. You don’t want to die alone
This might sound a bit selfish but the thought that there would be someone made from your blood and bones shedding tears and holding your hand when you are preparing for your last journey is rather reassuring.
What are the wrong reasons to have a baby?
Yes it’s true people often have a baby for all the wrong reasons and end up being extremely unhappy about it. You should never have a baby if you are not ready for it no matter how much you are pushed into a situation.
Here are 5 wrong reasons for having a baby.
1. It would salvage your relationship
No it never does. A dead relationship is dead anyway. Bringing a child to the middle of that is a cardinal mistake. Nothing will change after that. Things could go worse actually.
2. It was an accident
If it was and if you are mentally and financially prepared to keep the baby then you must by all means. But if you are in no position to give the baby a good life or aren’t up to it mentally then you should think about it.
3. The child will be a support in your old age
No please. Don’t finish off their life with this expectation even before it starts. If you love your child you would want them to fly and if they love you they would come back to support you. But don’t let this expectation be the single most important reason to have a child.
4. To fulfill social expectation
That can’t be reason enough to have a baby. Those who are expecting you to have a baby won’t stay up at night looking after it or send it to college. It’s your decision so be aware if you really want it.
5. A child is inevitable after a marriage
Not necessarily. There are plenty of people choosing to be childfree. Having a baby without a thought is unacceptable. Couples should discuss their prep level before they decide to have a baby.
As written in this article earlier there are plenty of good reasons to have a child. Let your reason to have a child be a beautiful one and not a wrong one.