As appalling as it may be, your boyfriend finishing the season finale of Nine Perfect Strangers while you were still stuck at work does not count for being sneaky in a relationship. You may be so enraged you want to throw the remote at him but hold it, because he technically did no wrong. This is assuming he didn’t give you a spoiler. If he did, then by all means – go to town and throw anything you can get your hands on.
Although, if you do have a hunch that something else and something far eerier is going on in your relationship, it might be time to take a closer look at what might be making you feel this way. Maybe you’ve picked up on their new habits and behaviors that are telling you that things are just not the same.
These could be anything from giving you a cold hug when they get back home from work to being extra protective of their phone or just getting distracted and sweaty when you’re trying to eat dinner together – are you seeing these signs of a sneaky partner?
What Does Being Sneaky In A Relationship Mean?
Ricky Moldenhauer had been living with his girlfriend, Angela. Having gone out for four years, he was well accustomed to her body language signs and cues. He knew her enough to realize that she would instinctively bite her bottom lip every time she told a lie. When she did it around other people, Ricky thought it was cute and never found a reason to bring it up.
But then there came a day when he noticed that she had been biting her lip, whenever he asked her a question about where she had been, far too much. That’s when it stopped being cute and Ricky was worried that something much more serious was going on.
Ricky was experiencing first-hand what being sneaky in a relationship means – that one person is not being entirely honest or upfront with the other. Either, they clearly have something big to hide or they are protecting you from some kind of truth that will baffle you. Whatever it may be, sneaky behavior in relationships can make both partners feel extremely uncomfortable and anxious.
On one hand, one partner is using all their time and energy feeling nervous about hiding a secret. On the other hand, the other partner can tell something is off, is disturbed by it but doesn’t exactly know how to deal with it.
Related Reading: What Does It Mean When Someone Ignores You?
7 Signs Your Partner Is Sneaky
If there’s an immediate and obvious shift in your partner’s behaviors or mood, you have reason to go on and read this list that will tell you more about sneaky behavior in relationships. Even if it’s as little as them not sending you the same emojis as they used to pepper in their flirty texts or if there’s an inkling bothering you, it doesn’t hurt to double-check.
And that’s where we come in. We can’t put all your worries aside but we can tell you if there’s something you should be bothered by or not. So if you’re wondering what makes someone sneaky, you’ve come to the right place. Read below to find out.
1. Being ignorant is one of the traits of a sly person
“I don’t remember you telling me about that.” “Huh? Are you sure?” “I didn’t know that would affect you so much.” These are now commonly heard phrases in your relationship. If you agree and are worried about the same, then you need a down-low on how to deal with a sneaky person because you definitely have one on your hands.
If they act clueless, they know they can just get away with it because you’ll probably brush it off and move on. When Amanda pulled Connor into a room at a party to ask him what he was chatting up another girl about in the kitchen, Connor plainly said, “Huh, I don’t even remember,” A classic among the traits of a sly person, do not take this one lightly.
Related Reading: When A Woman Feels Neglected In A Relationship | What To Do
2. Being overprotective of devices equals being sneaky in a relationship
Maybe you texted your partner while they’re away, saying, “Hey! My laptop just died and I cannot find my charger. I need to send a quick email so can I hop onto your computer?” Now if they are showing traits of a sly person, their immediate response will be “Hey, sorry but you’ll have to wait. I’ll help you out once I’m home”
And that’s where your unending spiral of ‘what is he/she hiding on the computer from me’ starts. You’re probably already worried that they’re cheating online. If this isn’t a big enough tell for you, we don’t know what will be. Sneaking out of the bedroom to take calls late at night, never letting you touch their phone, etc. are all signs you should be wary of.
3. Pay attention to body language to understand what makes someone sneaky
If you’re wondering what makes someone sneaky, then pay close attention to their body language cues to understand what’s going on with them. Excessive fidgeting? Tics? Stammering when they talk or bouncing their legs too much under the dinner table?
And within those cues, pay even closer attention to their face. Immediately cutting eye contact, smiling nervously, having a blank dumbfounded expression every time you ask them a question – are they doing these things more and more around you? Because if the answer is yes, then these are traits of a sly person you just cannot overlook.
4. They seem to keep canceling on you
Stood up by your girlfriend on a double date you had planned? Or is she constantly using ‘girls night out’ as an excuse to get out of hanging out with you? Is your boyfriend always neck-deep in work whenever you hit them up with plans to hang out? Does always come up at the minute and he has to cancel? If two weeks ago they could not get enough of you but this week they can barely make the time to text you back, then something is amiss in your relationship.
They’re either being sneaky in a relationship because they’re cheating on you or perhaps avoiding you because they’re scared of confronting you about something. It could even mean that they’re dealing with something personal and don’t know how to share it with you. But if you are sure that they are avoiding you completely, then that’s something you need to discuss with them ASAP.
5. A more defensive tone points to being sneaky in a relationship
Most times when one opts for a defensive tone in arguments, it’s because they have something to hide. Maybe they normally placate arguments saying, “Honey, please stop thinking that. I would never do such a thing.” But now, they lose their cool at the drop of a hat and say things like: “How could you possibly think that way about me?”
If this rings a bell and reminds you of your relationship arguments with your partner, then your problem runs deeper than the argument you two were having. Somebody who is in the clear and knows they’re doing the right thing can maintain their cool, look you in the eye and convince you of the same. But if their instant response is anger and frustration every time you bring up a problem, there is something that they are not telling you.
Related Reading: Fighting Is Fine…But How Do You Know It’s Over?
6. Their stories never add up
The last thing that Tracy is in her marriage is ignorant. From the moment Hunter walks into the house to their goodnight kiss before they doze off to sleep, she pays attention to everything he says and does. Owing to that, she started noting inconsistencies in the things he would tell her. She realized she had a lying husband on her hands.
He said he’d be home late one night because his college buddy had come to town. But when Tracy asked him how dinner went, he said, “Oh, the usual. Everyone was just trash-talking the new boss,” indicating that he had gone out to dinner with his work friends. Besides being confused and annoyed, Tracy was now riddled with the dilemma of how to deal with a sneaky person.
7. They seem to wander off alone sometimes
Finally, made the time and mustered the energy to catch a flick at the town cinema after work only to see them receive a text and wander out in the middle of the movie? What’s so urgent and nerve-wracking that it couldn’t wait until the movie’s happy-ever-after? Clearly, that’s one of the signs of a sneaky partner and sure-shot evidence that there is a kink in your own happy-ever-after.
If they seem to get distracted quickly, are easily bothered and often leave without an explanation or are having a difficult time being present on dates with you, something is on their mind which is why you have to deal with being ignored in this relationship. It’s time to put your head together and figure out how to deal with a sneaky person before things get much worse.
Hopefully, after reading this we haven’t sent you on a spree to search their bags and sniff their shirts. Before acting too quickly and jumping to conclusions, take some time to think about how many of these signs are resonating with your relationship. Then figure out a good time and place to talk about it and get to the bottom of why your partner is being sneaky in a relationship.