Counselling

Boyfriend does not call me or spend time with me, does he love me at all?

How do I find out what I mean to the boyfriend who ignores me?
sad girl near window

Question:

Dear Ma’am,

My relationship is 3 years old. My boyfriend stays busy and does not have time for me. He does not call me or speak to me. Is there any solution? He is a busy person and now I don’t feel the attraction either. What should I do? How do I remind him that I exist? How do I find out what I mean to him?

relationship counselling

Mallika Pathak says:

Hello,

I understand your problem.

The comfortable zone: Sometimes in long-term relationships, we start to take each other and the relationship for granted. We enter [restrict] a comfortable zone and sometimes assume that we no more need to put in efforts for the relationship.

Not healthy: While it is a zone of safety, it is not necessarily healthy. It’s very important to feel wanted (in an appropriate way) in a relationship.

Communicate: Talk to your partner about this, make efforts and ask him as well to make the same from his side. It seems to be something that a little bit of honest talk and some efforts will resolve.

Low attraction: If you feel a lack of attraction towards him, it may be time to reassess your feelings and to understand what you’re getting from the relationship. Talk to a close friend or confidant who can be unbiased. Get some perspective on the situation from your close ones. If you feel the need, talk to a therapist to get unbiased perspective.

I wish you all the best,
Mallika

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  • Facebook Comments

    2 Comments

    1. So what is the point inn maintaining in a relationship where you know that you are not attracted or like You have been ignored. Find out the reasons. It is your problem and it should revolve around you only. Peace.

    2. A relationship is not a one sided affair, it takes two! If you feel that you are the only one putting in effort into it, then maybe its time for you to consider stepping out of it. If you are being taken for granted, if you show him that he can continue doing that then he will. Sometimes you have to walk away so that people realize the value you add to their life. Only know you love her if you let her go.
      so then if he wants you back, he will make an effort. But if he doesn’t then its his loss and you will find happiness elsewhere.

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