Married Life

Calcutta Liberals admin Mita Chakraborty: ‘Never discuss politics with your partner!’

Calcutta Liberals is a Facebook group that provides a forum to strong women to express themselves freely

Mita Chakraborty speaks to Bonobology about being Admin of the robust Facebook group, ‘Calcutta Liberals’, love, and marriage.

When and why did you join Calcutta Liberals?

The group was founded by a New York based gentleman, I was part of this forum since late 2013 and started operating as an Admin from early 2016. This forum is known for high-quality political debates and moderating such a list is a demanding and time consuming job, as you can imagine, but I agreed to do it, as I felt the strong need for the liberal voice to be heard. I felt it was important for a liberal, progressive space to exist for this group to be able to voice their views and concerns freely and hence joined in.

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Related reading: 10 things only a Kolkata girl does in a relationship

How active are the women participants here?

This is predominantly a debating forum and there is a definite presence of the female voice in the group. The women are well informed and have opinions on all subjects discussed. They present them very well as well. In fact, even though quantitatively the men are more active then women, the female contribution is qualitatively significant. The trend which to me is heartening is that since the past few years this participation has been increasing each year.

 

Related reading: The Femininity Group founder Antara Rakesh: I want to celebrate women for everything they do

Is this a left wing group?

The general perception is that the left wing supports liberal values and that the right wing is not open to new ideas and thoughts, but our page is predominantly ‘centrist’ and we welcome all. We have well informed debators from left, right and center.

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What does your husband have to say about your social media participation?

(laughs) He thinks social media is not a constructive use of time. Even so, he has been supportive of my role as the Calcutta Liberals’ admin. He understands how much and what it means to me and that is important to me.

Related reading: Married Superwomen admin Malavikka Sridharan: ‘Whenever you feel small, do something big!’

Would you like to share a special anecdote from your courtship period?

My husband and I had met in Sierre, Switzerland through a common friend. I was working in an IT company, while my husband was visiting Switzerland. We got to know each other better and started dating soon after. We used to live miles apart and hence had to wait for weekends to be able to meet! He would take the last flight from UK to Geneva on Friday evenings and then take the last direct train from Geneva to Sierre where I lived. One time the flight was delayed and he missed the Geneva connection. He got into another train that did go via Sierre but what he didn’t know was it was a train that didn’t stop there, but was headed towards Italy!

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But this weekend was special. He was carrying a ring to propose to me and nothing could stop him!

When he realised that this was a direct train that wouldn’t stop he went up to the engine driver and explained the whole thing to him in sign language as the driver didn’t understand English. The kind and empathetic driver understood the situation! He could not have stopped at the station as that was against the law, but when Sierre came he really slowed down and signalled to my husband to get off. As he got off, he thanked the driver and waved at him with heartfelt gratitude!

He proposed that weekend and I said yes.

What are deal breakers and deal makers in a relationship?

After being married for so long, when you have invested so much into each other and the relationship, what can be a deal breaker? I guess infidelity comes close to being a deal breaker depending on the situation.
And everything else is a deal maker. The emotions that one puts into a marriage, every single thing that you do together, raising children, being a family, leading lives together… every single investment, big or small is a deal maker.

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What advice would you give to a couple that have diametrically opposite political views?

Never discuss politics! Well, that’s what we are trying to follow at home, that’s why I confine all my political debates to CL.

Pati, Patni and Politics: How to manage differences in political views

When husband and wife support opposing political parties

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6 Comments

  1. Awesome interview, Mita. Wow, didn’t know about how Shamit da proposed you. Amazing and beautiful.

    PS- We at Calcutta Liberals encourage inclusiveness. The moment someone breaks this pattern and starts bringing discrimination/prejudice/hate to the table we remind him or her it’s not the perfect place for them, unlike Bombay Liberals which is run by Right Wing Extremists and is only a place to promote hate against Liberals and minorities.

  2. I was a member of Calcutta Liberals for almost 4 yrs but unfortunately in 2017 got expelled from the group for openly voicing my views. Calcutta Liberals is predominantly a group of Leftist, Mamta supporters, Muslim fanatics, anti-RSS, anti-BJP and anti-Modi establishments. At times you may witness in this group Hindu sentiments being openly blemished.

    If you don’t tow in line with the ideals of the dominant group of the Calcutta Liberals, in all likelihood sooner or later you will be expelled. So prepared to go with THEIR WAY and not MY WAY …. 🙂 This is what Liberalism mean there….

    If you are interested to taste LIBERALISM in real sense, better visit BOMBAY LIBERALS (https://www.facebook.com/groups/1652533501464566/?ref=nf_target&fref=nf)

    Thanks for writing this article. It is well written and deserve appreciation.

  3. Bengali Lady Entrepreneur is a very very rare specie and she is one of them. Yes, her presence is CL is very strongly felt particularly when a virtual class between diverse political views happens. She does act very strongly but in a decent manner. Incidentally I was nor aware of her personal details particularly the Cupid affair in a foreign land. Love is a promise that lasts forever and she is proving that. This love episode could be beautiful theme for making a Film. Thanks and with the Best Wishes.

  4. Just wonderful. Being a member of Calculate Liberals is very rewarding as it enhance my knowledge about so many things regarding politics to social issues.

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