Why do men think that helping the wife is shameful or makes them henpecked?

A friend of mine says that her husband helps her with chores only if she agrees not to discuss the same in his family, he is OK lending her support but no one should know, especially his mom. What is shameful in letting the world know that a husband cares for his wife?


I'd attribute this to a lack of confidence in men and so also the fact as to what will "others" say. More often than not, we do (or avoid doing) something out of the assumption of creating an impression of being henpecked. Should a man be confident enough and not be bothered about society-speak he can walk tall proclaiming that he helps his wife with household chores.

Not wanting to boast, I can proudly say that putting clothes for washing, drying them (even folding if the maid doesn't turn up) is my responsibility. This is in addition to accompanying my wife (when time permits) for grocery shopping without the slightest whimper. Due to division of labor, work gets done faster and we get to spent quality time with each other watching our favorite programs on television each night.

Incidentally, it's the same men who, when migrating to the western world will do all those jobs that they previously shunned. Why so?

  • amankh
  • Posted: 08 Dec 2016

Timidity when lies within, the husband may pose to be a Hercules.


I think its considered a taboo in our society because our spouses have seen only their mom's slogging in the house since we can even remember.... our dad's used to come home from office and not even lift a spoon... so even our husband's have the same mindset that since they slog in the office, working at home is against their ego cause most of their colleagues don't do so...

But I believe now times are changing and so is the thought process of our men... they are now willing to share the workload at home.... to some extent!


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