Married Life

Dear husband, I need you to love me

Sometimes, it is as simple as that. Sometimes, a letter that a wife may write to her husband is an SOS. And it is time to pay attention to the marriage.

Dear husband,

We have been married for seven years now. We have a beautiful kid. Our lives are comfortable. We have been through a lot of ups and downs, both financially and emotionally.

And you still don’t love me. You still regret the decision we made – that is, of getting married.

Maybe, it was a mistake. Maybe, it was not. I don’t know. But I have been trying very hard to make this decision turn out ‘right.’ To not let it become a regret. I have been trying to give my all to this relationship while you have always been in it with one leg out of the door. And now I am trying very hard to be happy in this situation. To hope that there will be love again.
Related reading: It took 7 years for me to find acceptance, love and respect in my marriage

I am tired of being strong about it. I can’t be positive and hopeful about it anymore.

I need somebody to love me, to be physically attracted to me. I need somebody to make love to me, to hold me, to caress, hug, kiss and cuddle. I need somebody to need me apart from when they seek me out for some work or errands.

I need the physical touch, the intimate caress. I need somebody to not hold onto grudges from the past against me. I need the person I stay with, to love me, to have faith in me, to trust me.

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I have always considered you to be my priority. And all I needed from you was that you consider me as one too. Even after having our child I don’t get the feeling that you put us first. You view us just like you view your employees: like an obligation. You love your daughter but you don’t want to take up your share of duties, the little and big things that are a part of parenting.

I don’t want to be looked upon as some sort of an obligation. I don’t want my husband to hold each and every thing against me. I don’t want to be depressed when I think about love.

I want someone to love me – plain and simple. I want someone to accept me, and love me for who I am. I want someone to give me as much importance as I give him, or he gives himself.

Related reading: What she did to get him to listen to her

I need that person to want me. I need someone to make me feel loved about my own body. I don’t want to feel self-conscious about how I look when I am with that person.

married life

I don’t know what my journey is, but I am at my wit’s end contemplating that why is my journey not filled with love? I don’t want to be depressed and angry about it. Fighting and arguments are okay. But the need, the want, the desire, the comfort should also exist in the relationship.

I am tired of the indifference. I am tired of thinking “Why?”  I am tired and tired of waiting for that person to love me. I am tired of waiting for love.

-Your wife

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1 Comment

  1. your story is similar to mine. i’m in 11th year of marrige and still feels so lonely. even being a working woman, i only have responcibilties in my life. mine was a love marrige and we are blessed with a wonderful son. my hubby judges me for everything and i’m quite far from him emotionally and now physically too. though we stay in the same house but he is so obessed with himself that my opinions, my desires, my tears doesn’t matter. i’m trying to save my marrige but dying from inside. he wants a perfect wife, who is slim, beautiful, fulfil all the duties inside and outside and doesn’t raise her voice. though he himself far from being average. if i ask anything, he abuses me and hit me sometimes, saying that i deserve it. i dont know what to do. i’m stuck in a sexless and loveless marrige for the sake of my son and somehow my onesided love is still breathing with a hope.

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