Can one person love three persons at the same time?

I am struggling since last 1.5 years to get an answer of the question..that can one person love three persons at the same time? 2 years back cupid hit me and had fallen for a married man. Knowing the fact he is married inspite of my best efforts I couldn’t controlled my feelings for him. He too reciprocated and confessed his love for me but also said that he love his wife too and he cannot destroy a family. But he don’t wanna loose me either. I too accepted. Things went worst when after six months I came to know that he is a big support to one of his childhood friend who lost her husband 10 years after her marriage when she was just 30. She is his first love also. When he found her she was in a very bad mental state and he gave her all kind of possible mental, emotional and physical support to her to fill the void space in her life. His wife too aware of his this friend but not about their relationship. My main problem is knowing the full fact neither I am able to come out of this relationship nor I am able to happily stay. By now I have lost the count that how many times I had broken up with him but again after few days we both can’t stay and end up coming close again. He repeatedly says same thing he cannot afford to loose me. He says he cannot leave his wife as she has walked with him in all ups and downs for last 16 yrs…he cannot leave his friend because she will again break if he comes out of her life..and he cannot leave me because he loves me and cannot afford to loose at any cost. But somehow I am not able to accept this. How can one person love three of us simultaneously?

3 replies
June 7, 2017


  1. Yes it is possible to love three people at the same time though the degrees may vary. Conditions change and so does intensity of expression. Don’t deny your heart the true feelings. It was amorous for you. Treasure this. It made you happy. Yet, be practical. It is difficult to ‘OWN’ such a person. He has his commitments. Limit your self. Let there be a code for surely you owe yourself peace.

  2. Yes. It is possible for a person to love not just three, may be even more. When there is a certain chemistry between two individuals, of body, mind and spirit, there is bound to be attraction between them. If the environment allows, then there will develop an intense feeling for each other. It’s love only when it is without ownership or possessiveness, without compulsion and without expectations from each other.*p*In this case however, it appears to me, and I may be wrong, that he is making hay while the sun shines. The very fact that he “cannot afford to loose you at any cost” indicates that he wants to own you. That is not love.*p*I also feel he is taking advantage of a friend’s sense of dependence and gratitude. That is not love.*p*And then there is the wife, the fallback option.*p*All in all, what I see above is a man reluctant to let go and wanting to make all his property – ‘his wife’, ‘his family’, ‘his first love’ and so on…*p*Can there be litmus test? Sure. How will his reaction be if you have another lover?

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