Divorce in India

I got divorced when my wife and I realised we no longer were the people the other fell in love with. Our society still stigmatises divorce. What do you think are the top reasons for divorce in India?

6 replies
Ankur
June 7, 2017

6 Comments

  1. I strongly believe there is no precise answer to why a relationship doesn't work out. But yes, compatibility sure is one thing.*p*Also, the two need to understand and accomodate eachother's priorities.*p*I sure wish people/we could set our priorities right to understand and value marriage enough to put right efforts to nurture a healthy relationship. *p*

  2. Hi Ankur, I did a lot of research on this, went to many therapists and counsellors as I was working on my book. Understood these reasons…*p**p*1. Infidelity. *p**p*2. In-laws! (Yes believe it or not, In-laws it sems micro-manage even if they are cities apart) *p**p*3. Small town girl/boy marrying a big town person. Differences in the way they look at things…small issues become big ones! *p**p*4. Women stepping out, becoming independent. Men do not know how to handle it.*p**p* *p**p*Cheers,*p**p* *p*

  3. Boredom and monotony in relationship is a big issue nowadays. Couples, nowadays, have to work a lot and the mechanical way of living plays a part in the emotional disconnection between couples. I think this is one important reason behind modern day legal separations.*p*

  4. When one person is willing to work on a relationship and the other is not, is too busy, or doesnt see it as a priority, then people go seperate ways. Top reasons are many, from, wanting different things from life, to shocking revelations like sexual preferences, or extra marital relationships, from finances, to following different dreams, different paths. *p**p*I really dont understand this different upbringing issue these days. Yes every family is unique, every parent is unique, and so does every child shape into a unique personality. But its true, different upbringing is becoming a huge issue, with people, even at jobs. *p**p*As human connections become less, adjusting with another human is becoming very difficult, a little different and we snap… Where is the love???*p*

  5. Dear Ankur,*p**p*Like Raksha said – Infedility , inlaws, different upbringing,lack of exposure to global outlook of either partners, one more educated than the other- INFEDILITY tops the list though! as we search beyond what we have …*p**p*I feel personally that we really need to take a deep look into how to nurture and save rather than giving up in hope of finding something better. *p*

  6. Some times there are hard reasons – reasons which the courts recognise, like cruelty, desertion and so on – but many other times, there are the soft reasons. These soft reasons are those that we as outsiders to the specific marriage cannot understand well. It is unique to each – different things that are important to each spouse, different personalities and so on. *p**p*The main thing is that we need to come out of the notion that we can always live with peace, respect and happiness with the person whom we marry. If we treat marriage as a set of responsibilities, we could. But to most of us, it is more than that. It involves respect, empathy, sharing – when the marriage doesn't have the softer factors like these, it takes a toll on the marriage. There is a point at which the niggling unhappiness turns into a full-blown one, and we hit the threshold. That's when we are ready to lead our separate ways.    *p**p*Figures for India are not available, and it is difficult to get the reasons for mutual consent divorces anyway, but we are not unique. We are just catching up with what I suspect is universal. *p**p* *p*

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