Her husband is drifting away

A couple I know recently attained parenthood. Wife thought that may be a child will make him more attentive towards her, baby and her family. But things haven’t changed. He remains all the time absorbed in his own family squabbles and isn’t paying attention to his own family. He is also giving away the money to his family while wife is at a loss thinking what to do.

8 replies
Ayushi Vaidya
September 7, 2017


  1. seriously absurd of him! Though in many Indian families these are called sanskari boys who forget that Shravan Kumar had no wife or child all his life. Anyways, the couple first need to talk, patiently and positively to open each others’ mind towards each others’ future plans and present behavior. And I suggest Her to take no advice from any of those who had suggested her to have a child to make her relation better with Him.

  2. Really. A husband who does not give attention to his wife, will actually do so when a baby arrives. What kind of fantasy world are you living. Please have a discussion with your spouse about the whole issue. Show him what he is neglecting. Just like his parents are expecting time and hings from him, his family is too. Take help of a family member or a friend who is close to him. That might help.

  3. She should talk to his family and they might explain him. He may be doing it unknowingly or she may be overthinking.

  4. There may be issues that need to be addressed. Thinking that a baby will solve problems is so not right. The need to communicate, have a heart to heart talk, or if they cannot they should enlist the help of a common friend. if that doesn’t work, maybe try a counsellor.

  5. I suggest, let her the leave the baby with someone she trusts and have a open hearted conversation with him to hear his side of the story.. that will make it easier for her to decide on the future course of action

  6. We all have heard our parents, extended family, relatives and friends saying – ‘if things are not going smooth between you and your spouse, have a child, things will start getting better’ – of course it is a myth. How can one be so silly to not understand that if things are not good right at the moment – when you have all the time for one another, how can things get better when you have a child – all the time crying and vying for all your attention? One must have a baby only when both the spouses have good understanding and are on the same page.

  7. I find it beyond my comprehension & understanding that what makes a woman think that becoming a mother will improve the quality of her life as a wife- How can it?
    She needs to see a marriage counselor along with her husband.

  8. She should seek counselling if she wishes to, or talk to her own family and her husband. He has to look at his own family as well. Things can’t run like this forever.

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