How do make my religious wife understand that I’m not comfortable going to the temple?

I got married to a girl from orthodox brahmin family. She is very particular about all her religious practices and I on the other hand is very skeptical about all of this. I don’t want to impose my views on her but in return I don’t want her to impose her views too.Like, I don’t want her to force me to go to temple because I don’t want to. How I should make her understand about all this? That people have different views and ideologies and they should have the liberty to live according to them.

4 replies
Ayushi Vaidya
June 7, 2017


Anonymous July 13, 2017 - 10:22 am
Vaidi June 8, 2017 - 8:55 am

Talk to her. Or…just read out what you have written in your question to her. It should work. All the best!

Rohini June 8, 2017 - 8:55 am

It’s important to respect each other’s beliefs and space in a marriage. Tell her that you have your own way of being spiritual, and while you appreciate all that she does, it is not how you connect with religion. It is important to have this discission with her and be patient. Try and also discuss how your children will be taught to interpret these things. Perhaps if need be, you two can reach a middle ground. You can agree to partake in the really important ceremonies, and she can agree to not bother you about the rest.

Mayank June 8, 2017 - 8:55 am

Perhaps what she’s craving is doing things together as a couple. It may not be imposing a belief on you, but being a team for each other. There may be things you enjoy and she doesn’t, but a good partner will go along. Maybe tell her where you come from. That you may not pray everyday, but will come along if she really wants you to. Don’t think of it in term of religion and beliefs, but just as doing something to make a loved one happy.

Hridaan June 8, 2017 - 8:55 am

She might have been brought up in an atmosphere where all the family members assembled for Puja or other religious practices and she is just carrying on from where she left. You can surely be vocal about your feelings to her and provide her an image of your background and beliefs. I am sure she will understand.

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