How to go back to being my old self that husband liked?

After having a child, I'm always exhausted physically & emotionally and am a different person somehow. How to go back to being my old self that husband liked – more carefree, chilled out and cool person that I was?

7 replies
Avantika Chitlangia Sharma
June 7, 2017

7 Comments

  1. Aww! Oh dear… such a familiar question and so many women have asked themselves this, including myself. After having gone through the various and numerous ups and downs of pregnancy and delivery twice over, I can assure you that it gets better. It feels like it never will right now, But it will. After the slogging, the tears and crying (ours included), diapers, baby baths, kitchen disasters (as you had to leave the kitchen to attend to baby), sleepless nights, helplessness and frustration- there is a lot of joy in the form of a grown up kid and lots of free time to indulge in fun activities.*p**p*Am sure you are still as much fun as you always were – just that you are aware of your responsibilities currently and chosing to take them seriously. Looking after a little baby and home and family can drive the coolest and calmest people up the wall and feel totally out of control. But after the children begin school and settle there, things just change. And they'll get easier for you. Once you get to eat, bathe and sleep as per your will, what can stop you from becoming the fun person that you were? We mums are not that different from our babies. When our sleep and feed pattern gets disrupted, we get cranky too.*p**p*Hang in there and enjoy your baby, take a deeeep breath and smile. Stage one is going on. The stage two that you seek is not that far away from you. Trust me. :)*p**p* *p*

  2. Try traveling. That's probably the best remedy for almost everything. Go out and visit places with your husband where you first met or spent most of the when you were falling in love with each other, or some entirely new places. And discover your love for each other while you are discovering these places.*p*

  3. First of all congrats for your lovely baby. Now the issue of going back to old self – let me tell you that can not happen….we all evolve and change with time and I am sure your husband too must have changed. This is life and you need to enjoy all phases of life. Just be yourself and enjoy with your child and husband. I am sure he would also enjoy playing with the child – after all his child too. Why do you feel that he is looking for the same old time….But yes do try to find some alone time with him…..*p*

  4. First of all congrats for your lovely baby. Now the issue of going back to old self – let me tell you that can not happen….we all evolve and change with time and I am sure your husband too must have changed. This is life and you need to enjoy all phases of life. Just be yourself and enjoy with your child and husband. I am sure he would also enjoy playing with the child – after all his child too. Why do you feel that he is looking for the same old time….But yes do try to find some alone time with him…..*p*

  5. Enjoy your baby. Before you know she will be grown up and sprouted wings. And see that your husband is totally involved. Suffer from sudden back aches when you see him. So that he can put the baby to sleep. Enjoy me time. Pamper yourself enjoy your baby , parties etc can wait. Get a baby sitter if you want to steal some we time. *p*

  6. Thanks for the reassuarance Aarti, so I have heard – that once the kid is older things get better. He is 2 right now and things are still a struggle. Earlier the husband and I had our freedom for late nights, parties and the sort. We don't..or can't have any of that anymore and that puts a lot of strain on our relationship. *p*

  7. The thing is Avantika, taking care of a child is stresfull and draining. Please cut yourself some slack. We Indians (eso woemn) always think of what our husbands like even more than what we want. Do not think of him now and concentrate on yourself. Trust me you will see the wisdom of it in some years. So I would suggest, when you do get some 'me time' pamper yourself. Go for a massage, mani-pedi, watch your fav movie or sleep! Think of yourself and yes…you will be fun for yourself too then! *p*

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