Is feeling of love really important for a marriage to sustain for long?

We have either love marriages or arranged marriages. Irrespective of how you got married, do you think in absence of love a marriage can not be sustained for long? Conversely, do all couples who remain married and stay together through ups and downs of life are having at least some love or affection for each other?

12 replies
Saurabh Dalal
June 7, 2017


Anonymous July 13, 2017 - 10:22 am
Sabiha Khan June 8, 2017 - 8:56 am

I have seen marriages continue inspite of the love dying. The couple may still care for one another, be there when things go down, but that is more out of a sense of responsibility. Especially when children come into the picture, or finances are complicated, it just makes sense to stick together. They may not even realise that they are not in love anymore, just comfortable.*p*

ArchanaSharma June 8, 2017 - 8:56 am

Marriage as an institution has evolved over the years. Earlier it was treated more of a social contract where it's continuity was maintained at any cost. Love or absence of love didn't matter much. However as we see marriage today it cannot proceed beyond few years in absence of love. It's not out of compulsion that survival of marriage matters much. People choose to opt out if things are not going right.*p*

JoyeetaTalukdar June 8, 2017 - 8:56 am

Love is hard to depict because it's all about the emotional ups and downs of life that builds together that unbreakable bond between the two. So better the team work more is the capability of sustaining through this relationship between two unknown different personalities.There are marriages  without any emotional attachment  which are like a symbiotic mechanical relationship where one is reliable on other ,yet are independent too. Besides that to get a marriage going one creeps through the learning phases slowly. It's like a team work where one has to support and understand other and there by sustain through various phases of life.*p*

mishti upadhyay June 8, 2017 - 8:56 am

How things work in India is we are brought up with a mind set of let us make things work there is no much choice most of the time woman is financially dependent on husband and husband is not given much choice in selecting spouse of their choice, before they think they have children and life goes on many times for sake of child ,again we are taught to be responsible in kids brought up. Throughout this journey people do develop love for each other which is more than love a need for eachother .*p**p*Now in new generation people are more educated more financially independent so they don't believe in compromise adjustment sacrifice and all ,they want to live life at fullest, til the partner is in love or as.per their taste they are good once not they don't think much they get out of it.*p**p*But  love is eraless ,it's sublime pure and keep us human and loving each other if you have love then you are gud in your marriage anytime any generation,when you have capacity to go beyond you and love iirespecgive of love arrange you are blissed in life.*p**p* *p*

Bhagyashree Sowani June 8, 2017 - 8:56 am

In our  country,  social and  economic consideration have been given importance rather than love. Love was an outcome. *p**p*This generation only wants love in a relationship. *p**p*There are other factors which are important too*p**p*Like  respect, communication and the ability to make compromises. Without these its difficult for a marriage to last long. *p*

Himani Pande June 8, 2017 - 8:56 am

Believe me if there is no love in a marriage it's bound to fail down the years. Maybe one is not required to wear their heart outside their shirt as a measure for the heart beats to the recipient. Love doesn't need constant proclaiming. But yes assurance! Love makes a person feel worthy. A kind exchange or an easy smile and respect brimming eyes. Love doesn't ever demand excesses in fact it doesn't demand at all. The flow must sustain a natural and timely expression. Without love life is like a desert full of rude snakes. Love is like a small dose of vitamins. You need it regardless of a love or arranged marriage and certainly a mature expression of it in advancing years. That's the proprietary quality of a relationship.  *p*

Saurabh Dalal June 8, 2017 - 8:56 am

Superbly explained the difference between the older generation and younger generation. Indeed love is most important for a marriage to sustain. Else, people look for it outside of marriage or if not possible, die and wither within.*p*

Saurabh Dalal June 8, 2017 - 8:56 am

Wonderfully put together. Almost like a poetry. I have no doubt that you have written from your heart.*p*

Saurabh Dalal June 8, 2017 - 8:56 am

The factors you mentioned are probably important in all relationships, not only marriage.*p**p*But what if all these are present and love is not there. What will happen? Will they stick together?*p*

Saurabh Dalal June 8, 2017 - 8:56 am

I like the way you define marriage – something chosen as a matter of convenience and a team effort. But don't you think that love has any role to play in making people stick together inspite of having no common grounds ?*p*

Saurabh Dalal June 8, 2017 - 8:56 am

I agree that marriage is getting more personal over the years as opposed to being a social contract. But don't you think that the option of opting out is being exercised more and more as people are not giving love a chance to bloom properly.*p*

Saurabh Dalal June 8, 2017 - 8:56 am

So well put!! But don't you think that the sense of responsibility is also a manifestation of love? How do you define love? Isn't being comfortable with each other a sign of love? Would love to know your views.*p*

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