Isn’t falling in love something involuntary? What if someone is married and then falls in love madly with another man?

Isn't falling in love something involuntary? What if someone is married and then falls in love madly with another man? How to deal with a situation so complicated in a reserved society where the dynamics of loyalty come to light immideately in situations like this?

11 replies
Swati Mehra
June 7, 2017

11 Comments

  1. I feel the above question gains relevance only when the "love" is of the kind that leads to sexual desire. (If this was mainly a "love thy neighbour" kind of affection, then this question would not have arisen!).*p**p*Thus to avoid confusion, I will paraphrase the question as "What if someone (male or female) is married (or single, for that matter) and then experiences extreme sexual desire for another person?"*p**p* *p**p*Put that way, the answers do not appear as complicated as it would, if we get bogged down by non-issues like the "nature of love".*p**p*To answer this question, we need to consider the following:-*p**p*a) Can I give in to this sexual desire without causing hurt (physical or mental) to myself, to the other person or to any other 3rd parties? If the answer is "No", then I would just suppress the desire, and go on with life!*p**p*b) Does the other person share the same sexual desire towards me? Do I have the informed consent of the other person to make a sexual advance? If the answer is "No" to either of these, then I would do well to forget the whole thing!*p**p*c) Do I have the guts to take the risk of consequences — in case my assessment could have gone wrong in answering the above questions? If the answer is "No", back off!*p**p*If the answers are "Yes" to all of the questions above, then go ahead and indulge! *p*

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