Love for adopted children and step children

The love for adopted children and step children can be different as the former is a bond of desired love and the latter is not. Can both children get the same love? Is it possible?

5 replies
Ranjana Kamo
August 5, 2017


  1. It’s not the ‘kind’ of child that will decide that. But the adult. They can choose to find reasons to discriminate, find favourite etc. But all kids should be treated equally, in my opinion

  2. I think it depends on how you see it. In case of an adopted child, the love is much more deeper I guess because there is this extreme desire to shower all the love to the child that the couple had always desired to have.
    On the other hand, a step child is an entirely different scenario. The love may not be that deep in such a case because there may be some occasional prejudices that may crop up from time to time.

  3. A step child is also in a way adopted so there should be no difference in love, affection or care. It depends on the acceptability of the child in the family. Instances where an adopted/step child is differentiated in a large family is seen but that is a regressive attitude.

  4. Yes its possible, if you do not get yourself entangled and confused in thoughts about, where the child came from, or how it happened. Accepting a child and becoming parents is different than giving birth and assuming you are a parent. Just giving birth isnt enough, not is adopting a child a symbol of how pious and holy you are and how great a gesture you are doing. I dont buy that. Its not a holy gesture, its a need in a person, thats fulfilled. So if i am a mother or father, I will invariably love both as same, because I got one by nature and got the other one willingly, on my own, I INCLUDed her into my life. It wasnt forced on me. It was a concious choice.
    Most importantly, unless one is sure, please do not adopt. Adoption is more than parenting, its inclusion of a person with whole soul and body and her past and everything that you could possibly think.. So this choice has to be made conciously, mindfully.. not because everyone else is doing it.. If one feels so much for the homeless, please go volunteer, but adopt is a huge choice and not some, Pious and ‘Holy” decesion.

  5. It is not about a child being born out of love.
    A little child needs love and as an emotionally well adjusted parent it is wise to love your child and not rationalise where the child came from.
    Adopted or not, a young vulnerable child responds to care, affection and unconditional love!

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