Splitting finances

It is important for both partners to share equal responsibilities in a relationship. But how do we decide what is equal in something as multidimensional as marriage? Take money, for example. How should married couples split their finances? What if their salaries are not at par or one has other responsibilities? I would love to hear the different points of view.

10 replies
June 7, 2017

10 Comments

  1. There is an old adage that says 'Matrimony is often a matter of money!" However, that is a rather skewed way of looking at a beautiful bond. I feel that both partners should discuss their finances, and jointly decide how to share the responsibilities. There should not be a hard and fast rule here, just a mutual understanding and a feeling that the money brought in belongs to both and should be treated as such. *p*

  2. Use this app called as Splitwise. :P*p**p*Anyway, You just have to make sure that the money is enough to pay your bills and to fulfill other amenities and split it accordingly. And, if both the partners don't understand then I think you need to sit and talk. Both husband and wife are responsible for each other in every way. That's why we call marriage as multi-dimensional. You need each other's support emotionally, physically, mentally, financially. And every aspect is as important as the other. *p*

  3. Remember one thing what you s his is ours. What is yours is only yours. .life is beautiful if you follow this adag*p*

  4. You are so right! That people are at different payscales…so I think there shd be a system of percentage. And one should have individual as well as joint accounts…in the end imbalance most of the times is also balance. At times one does more…at times the other…*p*

  5. there are so many ways for couples to share finances as well as duties. There's no one particular way that is the best. *p**p*What's more important is that couples discuss this and come up with some strategy and then just stick with it. *p*

  6. The answer can never be the same for everyone. Like many questions in life, one would have to say, "it depends". What is most important is that both realise it is a joint responsibility.*p*

  7. You have put it amptly by saying "how do we decide what is equal ". Everything does not have to be euqal in a marraige. It practically cannot be. Somehow we have been brought up with a notion that marital responsibilities need to be equal. Thats impractical and may lead to confussion , frustration and lack of compassion between partners.*p**p*Let me take the same example as your;Finances.*p**p*Sharing of rsponsibilties should ideally be determined by the skills that partners possess and what they can conribute accordingly. Secondly skills that they can develop and therefore learn to contribute. *p**p*If one partner earns more than the other, its practical that s/he contributes to bigger chunks. Eg, an EMI or Home Rent etc and the other contibutes to Groceries and home maintainenance bills. *p**p*Sharing or equal shraing of responsibilties nowhere means 50/50. It means each does what they can do. Relationship demands YO-YO between demands from each partner, sometimes one contributing 70% and sometimes 40% n vice versa. Its about which partner has the ability to take charge of the moment and do best.*p**p* *p**p* *p*

  8. I think both should segregate a certain chunk of money as savings from thier individual salaries. That is the right way to go about it. It does not matter if one gets more salary than the other. I have always maintained that savings are the most vital possesion. They can divide the expenses within themselves and it may not matter who provides for food or electricity in a certain month. What really matters is how much they are able to save at the end of the month.*p*

  9. Responsibilities in a marriage are too complex to divide equally. Sometimes, usually the woman, is the primary caregiver to children and in laws and is not working. How can she be expected to contribute financially. Yet, she is contributing her time and energy. These matters differ from marriage to marriage and are decided by the couples through spoken and sometimes even unspoken negotiations.*p*

  10. True! But problems arise if one perceives they are doing more than the other. A joint account makes sense, with a percentage of their earnings going there.*p*