The married Bed

Who makes the first move? And how? Especially when one is married it is extremely easy to put sex as the last thing on your mind, but if one does, have a rocking sex life, who is the initiator and what are your moves?

12 replies
Malini Misra
September 1, 2017


Meenu Mehrotra September 20, 2017 - 5:52 pm

The lady can just drop subtle hints- dress seductively for one, initiate a conversation that is non-serious and make use of eyes and hands
to the utmost…rest can follow organically- yes, it is interesting for a man to watch his woman initiate:)

Saurabh Dalal September 16, 2017 - 6:34 pm

A lot depends on the cultural background and upbringing of the person. e.g., while men are universally more vocal in initiating sex, ladies from the more extrovert cultures like Punjabi or Gujarati or from matriarchial societies are more vocal about their needs.
Also, It is after all a question of feeling the need for it. and everyone has different needs.
Another thing, In my experience, need of sex is something that only increases with practice.The more you indulge in it, the more you desire it. If you practice celibacy most of the times and remain unexposed to sexual imagery and thoughts, desire also reduces. And vice-versa. One interesting personal observation that I have is that when I send sexts and intimacy related articles to my partner during the day, she is much more in the mood and ready to initiate in bed at night.

Tuli Banerjee September 7, 2017 - 12:56 pm

It should not be so rigid – as to who makes the move – whoever is feeling horny or passionate must make the move. Why make it so tough?

Malini Misra September 5, 2017 - 4:43 pm

@ Meenu mehrotra
🙂 good that the chemistry is so strong that it doesn’t matter who makes the first move, but if the lady would make the move, what and how would it be, would be interesting to note.. 😀

Malini Misra September 5, 2017 - 4:41 pm

When you say, it is unbiased that the man itself, makes the move, what does that mean? does it mean that the woman never makes a move, if so, why do you think so…

Malini Misra September 5, 2017 - 4:31 pm

@ramendrakumar.. seems like you have mastered the art. More men should read this. Bravo..

Raksha Bharadia September 5, 2017 - 12:37 pm

Hahahaha nice! @ramendrakumar! Nice!

Ramendra Kumar September 5, 2017 - 12:34 pm

I have always been the initiator. And my move is usually through conversation – flirtatious, intimate and finally erotic. The physical foreplay, again initiated by yours truly, follows and when finally the Queen Bee is ready, the Worker moves in (pun unintended).

Rachana Chakraborty September 3, 2017 - 1:50 am

Of course it is always the Man who makes the first move when it comes for sex. Though it doesn’t matter who makes the first move but the answer goes unbiased that it is the man who makes the first move.

Abhijit Gadre September 2, 2017 - 9:30 pm

Brings me into a classic suhaag raat scenario. The guy is thinking on two things, how to remove these excess flowers from the bed so that he can deflower the bride. The girl is eyeing from her Ghungta at a level to see if that guy has it strong enough to last like the last one. Now how do we start?

Meenu Mehrotra September 1, 2017 - 5:37 pm

Does it really matter who makes the first move?
When the chemistry is bang on, this question is a waste of time:)

Anshulika Bansal September 1, 2017 - 2:54 pm

Well, the moves depends on your partner’s likes and dislikes.
The arousal pattern and G-spots can only be known when somebody makes a move.
Now who makes the move is a question of concern when it’s an arranged marriage.
Usually a long stare at your partner also works. It depends on how you communicate your desires to your better half and how your better half graps your signals.
The chemisty usually works in such cases.

And if it is a love marriage or couples who are first time together, usually a man makes a move as I have heard until now. But the world is changing and even women are quite vocal about their sexual desires.
I remember when me and my boyfriend had our first time together. He made the first move by cuddling me and carressing my waist.

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