When women woo men

Fellow community members, a simple question- why can't men handle women asking them out or wooing them? Why do women have to wait for the man to ask her out. Why do my friends tell me "nooo, you see if he is coming for you, if he calls you first"? I can't even think of any movies where the woman courts her man or confesses her love and he does not hurt her. She has to wait for him to come after her/ to realize. Why does it seem as if it ONLY depends on the man's will?!

9 replies
Saumya Tewari
June 7, 2017


  1. Ballroom dancing has its own ettiquetts. That teach men to respect women's consent. *p**p*In real life on the other hand, men don't seem to have much regard for women's consent- socially, and even in the media, men asking women (sometimes to the extent of pressuring) is okay. But when women want to ask out men, they are often perceived as "pushy" or "desperate".. *p*

  2. Frankly, I find men needy- especially who keep coming after you and will lie to you about how much they like things you do or find reasons to be meet up etc. Creeps me out!*p**p*One guy I remember actually tried to give me career advice and how I should apply for new jobs like him. And once I tried giving some advice to a guy I was interested in- when he complained about wrok- he got offended and never spoke to me after that! :P*p*

  3. I know many people where the woman approached the man and it was all normal. It's all about whether you want to break the gender stereotype or not. If you want to then you shouldn't think about anything else and go ahead. This is with respect to everything and not just love. We have to get over the silly Bollywood propaganda which preaches stereotypes. *p*

  4. Years of conditioning has made us think like this. Society in general and men in particular really don't know how to handle an agressive woman who has no qualms in getting what she wants. We have always wanted women to be 'coy' and the man to take the mantle of wooing. I guess be it a man or woman, what matters is the style of wooing. Wooing is an art, when you do it intelligently, it really doesn't matter who has made the first move – man or woman. Secondly, if you are a woman and want to court your love interest and he has a problem with it – not because he isn't interested (If that's the case back of immediately, otherwise it will come across as stalking) – but because you are a woman, then he is most certainly not the right guy for you!*p*

  5. I belive you have already named your answer. Let me put it this way, I have been going to these ballroom classes, where from the very first day they teach us that a man has to ask a lady for dance not vice-versa. Unfortunately many of man in my class shy away to ask for the dance. The women stand in the corner with their gal-pals making it more unfavourable for one to approach them. I wonder, when i will see the day, when I could be approached for a lead. *p*

  6. I have the same questions too! *p**p*It is only society that dictates things should be a certain way. I have very rarely heard of a woman asking the man she likes out or taking any initiative. We are always told to 'wait', 'let him make the first move', 'don't text or call him until he does'… etc etc. To the extent that if I ever tell even my Mom that I was speaking to so-and-so, her first question is- 'Did he call you or you called him?'*p**p*It is just the way we have been raised- the society we belong to. Ask men, I am sure some of them would love the idea of the woman showing interest and taking the first step.*p**p*However, some men might find it 'clingy', 'desperate', or 'needy', and those need to take a walk!*p**p*But, in my opinion, why can't a woman be a woo-man? I think that would be very cool :)*p*

  7. A pertinent observation, well — I ain't too big on wooing but if that's what my future to-be lady fancies. I'd go full power in whatever ways I could. I have tried and surprised many in the past, mostly I was more surprised than them by their reactions.*p**p*It has bigger shock effects than OMG suprise. But that hasn't stopped me so, yes. There's more in future. *p**p* *p*

  8. first i totally respect the protective nature of your friends they want the best for you.however, you are a mature sextual being and you should decide whats good for you not always listen to your friends.Coming to the point sometimes we men dont realize that probably the girl has a crush on us – i mean we feel she just likes us or is just being polite and sometimes we really miss all flirting signals that you give cause we are stupid at times.If you really like a guy just go and say "Hi" ,ask him about his favourite sport, games , tv series,cars,  music and he will start to like you and things will flow in the right direction. Dont wait for the guy to make the first move – sometimes the guy is scared ( he is a human being after all) , sometimes he might wait for you to give the right signals ,and sometimes he is waiting for the right moment to start the conversation.So, if you like him trust your instincts and talk to him.if he genuinely likes you he will let you know.*p**p*Please read the book – Undercover sex signal – by leil lowndes.( download free pdf)*p*

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