“I don’t want to be special,” say most women on this Women’s Day

Today is International Women’s Day! We know it by now, thanks to social media and the incessant messages we have been receiving on our phones with promotional discounts for ‘Women’s Day’.

So before going further, dear women, the customary ‘Happy Women’s Day’ to you all.

Now tell me, do you remember when is ‘International Men’s Day’? I bet you can’t. There’s always much more fanfare with ‘Women’s day’ because women ought to be made to feel special.

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Why we are given a special treatment is obvious from the following facts. We get lesser pay for the same jobs, we end up wearing more clothes than men when it’s humid and hot, we may be a scientist but will have to bear getting mansplained by a graduate on basic science, we will play mother to a male lead in a film even if we are both the same age, we have the same (if not more) hectic day as men do, but will be assumed to be just sitting at home or neglecting children, husband and in-laws when we are working.

The pretty girl with perfect make up tells us we can buy the expensive lipstick because ‘we are worth it’. But we are more special than that. Forget that lipstick, we have to even justify we are worthy of sitting for fifteen minutes without doing anything.

Girl applying lipstick
The pretty girl with perfect make up tells us we can buy the expensive lipstick

We are so special that we keep on doing unpaid jobs without getting any appreciation in real life. To get some kind of appreciation for our cooking, gardening and crafting skills, we need to post pictures online that could result in a few more jokes. But since we are special, those few more jokes can’t really hurt us. The only thing that hurts us is that we can’t post pictures of our washing, dusting and stay awake for children online.

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Media has been nice to us too. They have made us special by projecting us as being beautiful, superhuman, saccharine sweet, loving, caring and the great silent sufferers. Media assumes that since we are special we will live up to all these idealistic expectations.

Has anyone thought if we really want to be special and put on a pedestal or not?

The truth is that every moment we are struggling to live up to the constant expectations from us. We don’t want to make the sacrifices but we are left with no other choice. We don’t want to suffer silently but lack physical and economic advantages force us into it. We don’t want to be a “nag” but we care too much. We don’t want to stay in our unsafe homes but we realise that the world is far more unsafe than our homes.

We just want to be ‘us’ and not be defined by our relations.
We don’t want to achieve that greatness

The way our mothers, mothers-in-law, and grandmothers lived is a burden on us. We can’t achieve that great because we don’t want to achieve that greatness. We just want to live with our heads held high and be happy with some real-life appreciation for our unpaid jobs. We just want to be ‘us’ and not be defined by our relations.

We want to be mean, we want to be selfish, we want to be lazy and we want to be the adulteress without being judged because we are women.

No, I don’t want to be special. I just want to be an average human being who is treated at par with all other human beings; neither better nor worse in any manner whatsoever.

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