Why every couple should say ‘I love you’ more often

Team Bonobology

We know what the poets have been saying about love from time immemorial. But as we get used to the relationship and start taking love for granted, we stop saying ‘I love you’ to the person who means the world to us. While in fact, with life and couple relationships becoming more complicated every day, it’s important to start saying the L word more often to build a fulfilling relationship. Because who wouldn’t want to feel loved more often?

1. It shows that you are feeling mushy

When you say ‘I love you’ to the most important person every morning it shows that they are the first on your mind when you wake up. When you say ‘I love you’ after coming from work it shows how you miss them and glad to be back to them. When you go to bed with an ‘I love you’ it shows you are still thinking about them. Even when something reminds you of how much you love your partner and you send a text to let them know, it will instantly bring a smile on their face. After all a little bit of mush everyday is very healthy for your relationship.

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2. It provides a sense of security

When you say ‘I love you’ to your partner it makes them feel strong and secured. Uttering those three magical words provides a sense of belonging to the other person and they become sure of your commitment. One of the biggest reasons a relationship falls apart is when couples feel insecure about each other’s level of commitment. Saying ‘I love you’ more often reaffirms your partner’s feeling of being loved.

3. It increases oxytocin level

Oxytocin is basically a hormone secreted by the posterior lobe of the pituitary gland. It’s also known as ‘love hormone’ or ‘cuddle hormone’ because it’s released when we snuggle, play with our dog, make love, hug somebody or socially bond. When you say ‘I love you’ to your partner it intensifies their sense of bonding with you and it releases oxytocin. This ‘love hormone’ acts like an emotion amplifier that strengthens couples intimacy and compassion for each other. The more often you say ‘I love you’ the more your partner will feel ‘in love’. The more they feel ‘in love’, the more oxytocin they will release and that will ultimately make your partnership stronger.

Related reading: He never says ‘I love you’, but does this instead

4. It solves (most) disputes

Another big setback modern relationship faces is when couples feel neglected and underappreciated for their contribution. As the relationship grows older we start fighting nasty and end conversations on a bad note. We start apologizing less and criticise more. But when we start saying ‘I love you’ more often, especially to solve disputes, the other person feels less hurt.

5. Just because you love them

Remember how wonderful it felt when someone told you ‘I love you’ for the first time? Remember how wonderful it felt when someone told you ‘I love you’ the last time? That is the power of love the poets have talked about. When you love somebody there is no right time and wrong time to express your feelings. It becomes a ritual that you follow with complete compassion and true love. The more often you say the L word in a way that your partner knows you really meant it, the more your relationship grows stronger.

When was the last time you said ‘I love you’ to your partner? Tell us in the comments below.

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