My liver may be fucked but my heart is not. It’s been long that I had my first gray hair and thought that I had earned the right to be wrong.
Age, funny thing.
It brings the joys of being grown up and becoming the so called experienced. But I doubt about the things that I learned. It’s like when you wanted to be someone but finally have learnt to live to be the different you.
Do we grow? Or we just learn to accept the things like they are, or we grow to learn what we never knew can happen to us? Fucking confusing.
There was a time like most when I too wanted to rewind time, go back and fix everything. But not anymore. Now I want to fast forward time and know who and what we’ll be in future. I’ve learnt to be impatient now.
Will I continue to love you? Whether we will continue laughing when you show me how your colleague’s mother reacted at the wedding? Will we make love in the morning? I don’t know now but I want to.
I also want to see your reaction when you’d wake up with your wrinkles. Wish you continue calling me Pi even then and remind me that I keep forgetting. I want to check whether I would lose weight by then or hang my head down when you scold me for being lazy like I’m today. Oh! I hope I can make a good cup of tea by then. Trust me I’m working on it.
Today and every night when I go through our ‘saved’ conversations, selfies where I was 50,000 shades darker than you, remember how we missed each other and the chats between the moans, I need the fast forward button more than I ever wanted.
Aisha just be there.