My girlfriend’s parents are getting her married to someone else

Jaseena Backer
man hands on head

Question:

Hello Ma’am,

My girlfriend and I want to marry each other. We have been together for the past three years. Her family is against our intercaste marriage. When she spoke about me to her uncle, he refused straight away. After that, her father also attempted suicide.

This was too much pressure for her. Now she is soon going to get married to her parents’ choice. Please help us.

Jaseena Backer says:

Hello Young Man,

This is a complicated situation with emotions involved above practicality.

If you love each other, then your girlfriend should be able to stand her ground to support your relationship before her family. Her getting into a marriage by force spoils three lives.

The two of you should take this to both your parents. If her father is threatening suicide, would that make her leave you? Can she live with someone else having loved you? These are the things that you both have to think about. It is easy to succumb to parental pressure. If you both want to marry, then you both have to take the tough route and convince her parents.

Also, remember in this there is an innocent man involved, who is probably clueless about what he is getting into.

If her parents do not agree to your marriage then she needs to buy time with her parents so that there is an alternate plan to live together. Do not get into something that will not make you happy.

Good luck
Jaseena

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1 comment

Deb Chatterjee May 18, 2018 - 10:34 pm

If either one or both of you are earning/employed then first file a FIR with a local police and make every effort to move out. If neither of you are earning, then the problem is complicated because how will you survive?

Unfortunately our Indian society does not respect the justified wishes of children.

Good luck to you both.

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