Counselling

I am guilty of cheating on my nice husband with his friend

I fell in love and had an affair with an old friend but my husband is trying to improve our marriage.
sad woman

Dear ma’am,

I am married to a person whom I love and was in a relationship with him since class 9. Though there were many problems, I was still in love with him and continued to be with him.

I happened to be good friends with one of his friends and together we were enjoying our friendship. Slowly we fell in love. He confessed one day that he is in love, but since I was already with my husband, I ignored it. We continued to talk and also had physical relations. He satisfies me more than my husband. He is very caring and understands me.

But my husband is also nice. And now since my husband is improving on his relations with me I want to give it a chance, but can’t since I remember my friend a lot. Please guide me what to do. I feel bad about cheating my husband and guilty of being like this.

Relationship counselling

Prachi Vaish says:

Dear Confused,

I can understand the dilemma you are in but here I must remind you that you cannot have your cake and eat it too.

Your husband: If you admit that your husband has been good throughout, then your relationship with the other guy is purely out of temptation. You must accept it in your heart and then look at the bigger picture.

Your affair: What do you stand to lose if you continue your affair? And all the things that you stand to lose, are they worth losing over a relationship which probably has no future? We are faced with a lot many temptations in our lives and it’s okay to indulge in them sometimes (which you already have); however, you also must not lose your logical head over these temptations, but think rationally about the practical aspects of life.

Your marriage: You have built a good marriage with your husband and he still seems to be putting in an effort. I think you should try and look beyond your selfish motives of gratification and look at things from his point of view. Put yourself in his place and imagine how you would have felt to discover him loving another woman despite you putting all your effort in the marriage.

I think you’ll know what to do. I wish you strength and happiness!
Prachi

consult here native

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2 Comments

  1. Just because you have the guts to realize that you have done wrong, it is not going to make your worse deed an inch better. You have done wrong and now be ready to pay a price, which you should. Go, tell your husband. If you cannot, you have stll not realized that you have done the wrong thing. *GOD BLESS YOU*

  2. Just as boldly you had sex with your husband’s friend, you should boldly go and tell your husband about your extramarital affair and face the consequences of your cheating.

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