Think back to the time when spending more quality time with your spouse and family was all you ever wanted to do. Now, in the thick of this lockdown, every waking moment is a reminder: be careful what you wish for! The household chores are never-ending – clean, mop, dust, dishes, laundry, cook, repeat. Moreover, the grudges and grumbles of the spouse with nowhere to run might have also left you feeling exhausted and frustrated. With ten things to do on your plate, an annoying boss and a moody partner, our sympathies are with you.
If you’re struggling to find that balance between working from home and working at home, you are probably at your wits ends by now. Add children, in-laws and spouse to the mix, and you are a ticking time bomb waiting to explode.
You could swear you’re just one “let’s make Chinese for dinner” request away from biting your partner’s head off. This lack of space and ‘me’ time is causing an unprecedented spike in your frustration. You’re snapping at each other a lot more, bickering over trivial things, and driving each other up the wall by simply drawing a breath.
Sounds familiar? Well, it’s not your fault. After all, you’ve not seen another soul besides your immediate family for over two weeks now and that goes against the grain of human nature. In times like these, any virtual connection to the outside world can be a whiff of fresh air. Even more so, if that connection is stirring some excitement into your dull, drab routine.
What Is Harmless Flirting?
We all like to feel needed and desired every now and then. So when a really cute guy approaches you at a bar and makes you blush like a teenager all over again, there’s really no need to feel guilty about your husband who is waiting for you back at home. Harmless flirting is not cheating, let’s get that out of the way first before we break it down further for you. Harmless flirting simply gives you that kick or that excitement that you have been missing in your current relationship or marriage.
The thing with long-term relationships is that they are bound to start feeling a little overbearing at times. Seeing one person all day long might even want to make you pull your hair out, especially every time they ask you to pick up their laundry or berate you for forgetting the groceries. Don’t get us wrong, it’s not that the love from your relationship is lost.
It’s just that it’s dissipated for a while and before you let yourself dissipate too, indulging in some harmless flirting outside can help you feel like your best self. And once you are feeling like the best version of yourself, you can bring that fabulous new self to your present relationship and really turn things around.
Harmless Flirting Examples That Are Not Cheating
When you are married and flirting with somebody else, you might feel like what you’re doing is wrong and unfair to your partner. But being a charmer and knowing how to own a room is in no way going to compromise your relationship. As long as you know in your heart, that you are still madly in love with your partner, then you have nothing to worry about. With these harmless flirting examples, you can see that this type of flirting is only casual, fun and is not going to ruin your relationship.
Is it ok to flirt while married? As long as you are flirting with the intention of having a little fun and complimenting someone instead of seducing them, then you most definitely are only indulging in healthy flirting and it is okay.
- Raising eyebrows: Raising eyebrows when talking to them to indicate something can be considered harmless flirting since it’s a non verbal cue and doesn’t really convey all that much
- Brief glances: You might be sitting across each other at a dinner table with other people there and you end up stealing a few glances from them as you smile coyly
- Teasing them: Good banter can actually be harmless flirting because you aren’t trying to seduce them in any way but are also having fun with them
- Light touches: A brush against their hand, a light touch on their shoulder or laughing with them and then accidentally touching them are all harmless flirting examples that don’t mean anything serious
- Playful emojis: Yes, a lot of flirting happens online too. If you two end up sending funny or flirty emojis or GIFs to each other throughout the day without any real intentions, it can be just harmless and fun
Related Reading: Single Women! Here’s Why He Is Flirting When Married…
Harmless Flirting Can Save Your Marriage
That being said, we know you’re still sick of all that is going on at home around you. Given that extraordinary times call for extraordinary measures, we look at 5 ways harmless flirting can actually help you and even help save your marriage during this lockdown:
Being caught up in the rigmarole of grease, dust and grime, worn-out clothes, and catering to never-ending demands of work and home life can send your sense of self-worth plummeting. Amid this, an innocuous text from an old flame or a long-standing crush can just be the boost you need to lift your spirits and feel good about yourself.
2. It can fire up some sexual passions
Perhaps you and your partner were getting on with it every single day during the first few days of the lockdown, but then the sexual energies just plateaued and the lack of physical intimacy is only adding to your irritability. The sex just isn’t that good anymore and maybe even non-existent.
Now imagine, you initiate a chat with someone you’ve had the hots for and the conversation takes a naughty turn. You discuss your sexual fantasies or share your experiences, and suddenly, your loins are burning with passion. Rest assured, it’ll lead to some hot, steamy action between you and your partner.
And what’s treading on to a little grey area for a good orgasm!
3. It gives you a reason to look good
If you are indulging in flirting when married to someone, don’t feel too bad. Flirting can bring excitement into your life and make you a better person. Looking good is half the battle won when it comes to feeling good about oneself. All these days you may not have had the motivation to change out of your PJs and wear something nice, blow dry your hair and put some makeup on. But what if the person you’re flirty texting with wants you to send them photos or get on a video call? That’s motivation enough to work on your appearance. When you do, it’ll work wonders for your mood too, and eventually your marriage.
4. A reason to smile during a long day
Imagine you’re in the kitchen chopping veggies and cursing the human appetite or working on a never-ending presentation and also cursing your bosses. Suddenly your phone chimes and this person has dropped a text just to say they’re thinking of you and followed it up with a kiss emoji.
That ought to bring a smile to your face, make you blush like you’re in high school again, and suddenly – albeit fleetingly – make you forget about the pressures of all the daunting tasks that have been piling up on you.
Related Reading: What Is Micro-Cheating And What Are The Signs?
5. It gives you an escape from reality
Is it ok to flirt while married? We all need a break from our lives now and again, and that’s really no reflection of how we feel about the life we’ve built for ourself. Spending a few minutes every day to talk to this person about things that are as far removed from reality as can be – a discussion about a book or movie you both love, imagining what it’d be like if you both ever took a trip together or discussing the possibility of a one-night stand – can be that much needed fantastical escape that helps you maintain your sanity and prepare you to handle the real world with more patience and compassion.
The thing with harmless flirting is that the boundary lines are very thin. So you have to watch out for them at all times. Because what you may think is playful banter can quickly turn into one of the dangers of flirting when married if the other person starts falling for you or if your partner finds out.
If you do choose to go down this path, make sure to leave no trail behind because what you see as harmless flirting may not sit well with your partner and they will probably react differently. Your partner may already be feeling driven to the edge. Play it smart, stay indoors, stay safe!
It all depends on your intention when you are flirting with someone else. If you have been flirting with another person, think of whether you are developing feelings for them or if you are just flirting because it adds a pep in your step. If you indeed are flirting because you want to steer the conversation in a certain direction, you have possibly entered the realm of the ‘dangers of flirting when married.’
It can be, if your partner knows that about you and is okay with it. Flirting with other women at a party or knowing that your wife often flirts with her coworkers at her job — if it is open and clear that flirting is just a part of your personality, then it should be okay. The more secretive and mysterious it gets, the more problematic it can be.
It can be, yes. A little flirting can just be good for your health and give you that self esteem boost. It doesn’t have to mean anything serious, it can just be playful. A lot of married people indulge in healthy flirting outside of their relationship.
Your intention mostly determines what is crossing the line in a relationship and what is not. If you are trying to hit on someone because you are hoping to hook up with them or date them, that is most definitely crossing the line. But if you are just innocently complimenting them or cracking a few jokes, it shouldn’t be a big problem.