Counselling

He already has a steady girlfriend, but loves me too

We love each other, but he won't leave his steady girlfriend for me
A thoughtful young woman looking into the camera

Question:

Dear Ma’am,

Actually the thing is, I am in true love with a guy but he already has a girlfriend since the past twelve years! He told me about her right in the beginning of our relationship. But I couldn’t stop myself from falling in love with him and yes he too loves me a lot. But he cannot leave his girlfriend for me. He says that he loves her too.

The thing is all his family and his girlfriend’s family know about them. I get very hurt when he talks about his girlfriend to them. I just need your help. What shall I do? What will be good for me? Should I take one step backward or shall I continue with him? Please help.

Relationship counselling

Related reading: I divorced my wife, but my girlfriend won’t divorce her husband

Prachi Vaish says:

Dear Priyanka,

I’m afraid that the guy you love is using you as his backup. He wants to have his cake and eat it too!

To test this,[restrict] I suggest you talk about seeing other guys. Tell him that since he too has a steady girlfriend and will most likely marry her, it doesn’t seem fair that you should keep your life on hold, and that you’d like to start seeing other people. See what happens. When someone tells us they are in love with us, we as humans get greedy and want it all. That’s what he is doing.

You give him unconditional love and he’s just taking it. If he cannot take a stand for you, what good is that love?

If he cannot take a stand for you, what good is that love?

You have a life, career and probably a guy in your future for whom you will be the center of the universe, not a second priority. And THAT’S what you deserve…to be the number one! So go ahead and claim what’s yours…life is too short to settle my dear! Good luck!

Prachi

[/restrict]

What if you’re just the ‘backup’ plan?

15 signs you are a backup boyfriend

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consult here native

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