I am a 26-year-old girl. Thank you for this wonderful website where I can write freely about my problem and get expert advice. When I was in college I was shy and an introvert and I was underweight. So there were people who used to pull my leg by saying how skinny I am. Boys were not interested in me. I always use to feel depressed by seeing others hanging out with their gfs/bfs except me. I always felt bad about my appearance. But I never knew I would be so heartbroken in a relationship.
I am heartbroken in a relationship
I met a guy in my coaching class and we became good friends and gradually our friendship became stronger and stronger. Then he proposed to me. But my family was very strict so I told him it will not be possible because my family will never accept our relationship. We were both students then and I liked him as a friend but never thought of him as a possible life partner.
But he continued to be caring and loving and I wanted to give love a chance. He went for higher studies and always said that he would do everything for me so that we could settle down together.
After finishing his masters he did not get a job. By then my parents gave me an ultimatum that either I married him or married someone of their choice. But I kept waiting for him believing in our love and he then started avoiding me.
After waiting for really a long time I decided to move on although this relationship left me heartbroken and exhausted. I am emotionally upset.
Then I got a job in a private firm but due to some physical issues, I left the job. I was thinking of pursuing higher studies but finally agreed to my parents looking for an arranged match. There also I got talking with this guy and when things were going good his parents wanted me to go through some medical tests before they said the final “yes”. When I asked the same from their son they became angry.
Of course, the marriage did not happen but since then I have met a number of guys through arrangements by my parents but nothing worked out.
Now I have become very negative about marriage, I don’t trust anyone and I feel lonely. Will I ever find my soulmate? Please help.
Do you think love and marriage will solve your problem? You are dissatisfied with yourself. You can pursue higher studies.
You can get a job despite your physical problems. Once you’re financially independent and happy with yourself, only then should you consider getting into a relationship or marriage.
Right now you don’t have an identity and you are seeking that in marriage or from a boy. That is definitely not the right attitude. Once you are happy with yourself, you will realize that everything is falling in place. All the best.