Humdrum hum dum: 5 signs your relationships is desperately lacking passion

Ajinkya Sontakke

Passion makes everything joyful

Relationships are complex, but when everything is just about fine, you’ll see that every small joy gets magnified and the sun shines brighter than ever before. However, in some relationships, the lack of passion may bring about a feeling of not knowing what happiness feels like. If you’re experiencing unhappiness in your relationship and see some of these signs, then your relationship is desperately lacking passion and it is time you take corrective action to bring back the passion in your love life.

Related reading: 6 surprising mistakes you’re making that make your partner feel less passionate

Sex is out and no more kissing

A lot of us relate passion to being physically intimate. While this is true, it does not mean that your relationship has passion just when you have intercourse. A relationship where even kissing, hugging, cuddling is missing lacks passion desperately. You may have the best sex, but if you do not kiss, hug and talk romantically with each other, your relationship lacks passion.

You may have the best sex, but if you do not kiss, hug and talk romantically with each other, your relationship lacks passion.

Then you need to speak to your partner about how you feel your lovemaking sessions lack passion because of the lack of emotional connect and work together to bring back the lost passion and intimacy.

Spending too much time out of home

One of the two spends too much time out of home and the other does not understand why? It is a sign that your relationship is going through a phase of lack of passion. Very often when you or your lover spend too much time at work and do not feel like going back home or are not excited about meeting your partner in the evening every single day, then the relationship needs some work from both. “After 5 years of marriage, I am still excited every evening to come home and meet my wife,” says Abhishek. If this excitement is not organic for you, it is time you start working towards bringing back the spark in your marriage or love affair.

Sleeping in different rooms

My parents always slept in different rooms and I knew that their marriage desperately lacked passion. On the other hand, my grandparents had twin beds in their room but they made it a point to sleep in the same room if not on the same bed. They slept and woke up at the same time and in the same room. Their relationship had much more passion and understanding than my parents’. If you sleep in separate rooms, it is a sign that you need to put efforts to make your relationship passionate yet once again.

Related reading: My husband and I don’t have physical relations and he’s planning a separate bedroom too

Stopped sharing financial goals

“He does not tell me anything about his savings, investments or his financial goals. I am his wife and we have spent 36 years together. I feel so terrible that he does not speak to me about this at all even if I ask,” says Asha, a working lady from Chennai. If your partner and you have stopped sharing your financial goals with each other or do not want to do anything together financially, it is a very big sign that none of you want to ‘invest’ in relationship that lacks passion any more.

You avoid talking about the future

Love relationships are always forward looking. Having said that, you enjoy the present as a couple and also want the future to be better. In a relationship where passion is missing, you’ll see that the couple does not talk about the future.

In a relationship where passion is missing, you’ll see that the couple does not talk about the future.

My grandmother planned a party for my grandfather on his 75th birthday. My parents never planned such things for each other and never even spoke about it. If you have stopped looking at the future and completely avoid the topic of future plans with your partner, then it is time to introspect and find out why your relationship is lacking intimacy and passion.

As lovers, a relationship demands effort from both. In order to keep your relationship healthy, passionate and intimate, you need to not just be physically close but also maintain emotional, financial and spiritual proximity to bring your souls even closer.

You swore you’ll always be crazy about me, but you have changed!

How much of yourself should you give to a relationship?

How do you talk about lack of sex in a relationship and help bring intimacy back?

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