My best friend molested me. We were watching a movie in a theater and suddenly he hugged me tight and then started touching my private parts. I tried to protect myself and told him not to do what he was doing. But nothing happened. After 2 minutes I started crying, but he kept doing it. I felt helpless. Then he started apologising. I left the theatre and went home.
We are in the same college. How to deal with this situation?
Prachi Vaish says:
It is indeed infuriating that you were molested and your boundaries were violated despite that person calling himself your ‘friend’. You need to confront him first of all and tell him that what he did was wrong and that he has misused the relationship of friendship. You need to do this to fight the fear that might have settled inside you that must be making you feel like a victim. IT WASN’T YOUR FAULT. Remember that!
So you need to confront your perpetrator, no matter how he reacts. He might try to trivialise the issue or try to make it seem like somehow you gave him signs but DO NOT believe any of that. Say your part clearly, and firmly and then walk away. Have nothing more to do with him again.
The second thing you need to do is talk to a therapist who specialises in abuse recovery and who can help you process the trauma. Such a person would help you vent and make you feel safe and confident again. I’m suggesting you do this so that it doesn’t leave lifelong scars on your mind and you can recover from this incident. I’ll be happy to help you privately if you like.
In the end, I’d just like to remind you that you didn’t make any of this happen. It was he who was at fault and you deserved respect. All the very best!