My husband doesn’t allow to send my earnings back to my parents!

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Wearing a crown on her head (hypothetically), she heads towards her destination, emanating the surveillant popped out eyes like a pro. Chin up, with a smile she wouldn’t let go of, she comments ‘the awe, an independent working lady fills them with! And the shocking part is, ‘them’ consists of women as well.’

The thought served as a pathway that made her wonder about the hypocrisy of the society as she opened her car’s front door. On her way to her parent’s, she wondered how artificial this society gets when it comes to girls or their own daughters. A girl is expected to stand tall but with a tray in her hand and in front of her in laws, gets education but what’s that without mastering the art of cooking, they talk about the bold and courageous Durga and on the same hand it is considered a disgrace if a girl steps out to report her rape.

The thinking accompanied her on her way and as she reaches her home (or her parents home as society calls it after marriage), she was relieved. Finally she will be able to lend a helping hand to her mother who was not keeping well. The eyes of the neighbors again started popping out. Doesn’t she have to take care of her husband? How come she frequently visits her parents, is everything not well between her and her in-laws? Leaving the senseless commentary behind, she entered her house where she heard her mom bragging about her girl’s achievements, in pride.

‘She always takes care of us and every month she sends half of her income to us’ and the sentence pricked up the neighbor’s ears, ‘but from past two months she has been sending her full income as I was not keeping well’. ‘Full earnings?’ said the neighbour in a shock. ‘Does her husband allows her for the same?’

‘No, he doesn’t’ she says in a firm voice as she enters the hall room. ‘There comes Aadya’ exclaimed the mother in excitement of seeing her daughter. ‘He neither allows nor forbids, as I don’t ask him’. The sentence came as a shock of the neighbour’s life as what kind of wife, women, daughter or lady she is who doesn’t seek her husband’s permission? ‘He doesn’t control my earnings in a similar way as I don’t control his, what say Anirudh (who came out of the kitchen with tea and biscuits)?’

‘Who would dare to question Aadya, which is another name of ma Durga?’ answered Anirudh jokingly. ‘But on a serious note, who am I to give her permission? She is mature, can make her own decisions, can decide where she wants to spend. She is noble enough to contribute to our household as well as send remaining money back to her parents. Where am I gonna find a saint women like her? It doesn’t bother me if she spends her earnings on shopping, eating etc but yes I’ll definitely advise her, as she would to me, in case I felt she is spending over nothing or useless stuff. Otherwise I don’t have the rights to decide for her as she can for herself.’

Hearing this Aadya smiled from ear to ear as she thought she is the luckiest person to have found a man like him. Or is it she, who found herself and chose only a guy like Anirudh? She is indeed lucky but not only because of her man but because of herself as well.She stood tall for herself and her parents, turning a deaf ear to all the nasty comments and worked hard day and night to be an independent women, who wouldn’t give it all just to spend all of her life seeking permission from her husband but would rather stand shoulder to shoulder with her better half and make choices.

Maybe it’s time we stop waiting for our Prince Charming to come to our rescue and guard the throne on our own. Why not find the strong, bold and courageous women that lie beneath this sheath of tenderness that the world made a lot of us wear? Why not we give ourselves the permission to always stand up for ourselves and not settle for less?


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