My relationship with my husband got better after my kids left….

Rajika Malhotra
happy couple on the beach

When suddenly the nest became empty

All of a sudden there was a void in my life. My children developed wings and flew away. My nest became empty. I first felt miserable, lonely and unwanted, but in time started to enjoy it. No offense to my kids, I love them to death. However, once I tasted blood, I realised I needed my me-time.

Forgotten passions came to the fore, like reading, music, watching films, spending time with hubs and friends. The freedom of watching Baywatch without any kid shrieking, “Eeks, you watching that!!!” And enjoying many a rowdy evening with my girlfriends. I take vacations whenever the travel bug bites.

Rajika with her husband

No fear of interruptions

I could never cosy up to hubs without the fear of interruption. Now I even have the luxury to fight with him openly and without any inhibitions. We had an argument, which turned into a fight. I acted truly out of character by matching him scream-to-scream, word-to-word. I even vented my fury on him by flinging things at him. No need to placate anyone that it’s all fine, that we are not heading for a divorce. I surprised hubs with my spunk. Now there’s no need to be civil to each other all the time. I can even enjoy a meal alone with just the television for company. For a long time, I felt like his roommate.

Related reading: When the kids moved out, their marriage began afresh

Our relationship now seems healthier and spicier. Every night seems like a date night. It looks like we are on a rediscovering-each-other trip. Sometimes I get the feeling that the party has just begun. My fridge these days is stocked with all the junk I desire. I have freedom from accusations of “You don’t support me when I’m serious about my diet.” I never realised I could be so happy wolfing down a bowl of cereal for dinner while watching Big Boss.

Freedom to be messy

For a change I can be the messy one, no need to be Miss Goody Two Shoes, no worries about setting a good example all the time. Let me tell you about the time I got carried away by their empty rooms. I planned a huge walk-in closet in one and converted the other one into a funky bar.

Don’t get me wrong, my children light up my world. But who says you can’t have fun and laughter in an empty nest? Make the most of the situation. As they say, it’s a chance to finally focus on you.

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