My parents don’t understand me! I have a boyfriend and he is very serious about me. I told my mother this and she had no problems. But now after a few months she is saying that I must not continue with the relationship. They are saying that I should not meet him or talk to him. They made me leave my school and now I am appearing in open board. I want to die. I even tried to cut my wrist a few times to take my life.
I don’t know what to do. Please help me, ma’am. My parents don’t let me go anywhere alone. I don’t want to lose my boyfriend. I love him a lot.
Snigdha Mishra says:
Hello Young Lady,
You may love him or not, but killing yourself will certainly not help anyone.
Are you really an adult?: I can understand your frustration of parents not understanding your love for him or your relationship. Did you say you’re in school? I’m assuming you are not yet 18.
Look at it from this angle. You wish to be treated like an adult and left alone and choose your boyfriend. Right? Please correct me if I’m wrong here.
At the same time, you’re choosing to cut your wrists harm yourself, because you’re angry with your parents. Am I correct? Will a person who wants her parents to understand her and make her parents trust her and let her be, do that?
Focus on healthy communication with your parents: I suggest that you please maintain a healthy communication with your parents. Now, this doesn’t mean that will allow you to do what you want or vice versa. This means that both you and your parents speak to each other about your fears and aspirations about this boy and this relationship. You haven’t mentioned the nature of the relationship you’ve shared with your parents and how open is your communication with them. In any case, you have to learn to speak with them and them to you openly and without anger or frustration.
Please understand that your parents may be worried about you and your safety. Focus on why they’re behaving the way they are, discuss their worries and negotiate the best possible outcome.
Seek counselling: Most importantly, please speak with a psychologist nearest to you as soon as possible. Self-harm will do you no good and will most certainly not get you back to school or your boyfriend.
Think rationally about this situation.