Questions asked during arranged marriages

Team Bonobology
Eliana D'cruz

It is a huge misconception that people who have failed in love and relationships opt for arranged marriages. But by large, even now most of the marriages that happen in India are generally arranged. There are several questions that the society asks before every kind of marriage and there are many questions a girl needs to answer even before an arranged marriage. So, here are few questions that every bride who has opted for it faces:

1. Are you happy?

This is one of those questions that the nagging aunty asks just to squeeze out some gossip from you. If you give them even a tiny bit of information then they are going to add all the spices that are available and spread it around. So, why give them a chance? Just say yes and move on to their next question.

Related reading: 5 tips on how to make yourself the ultimate arranged marriage material

2. Did you have an affair?

This is an inevitable question when anyone decides to go for an arranged marriage. They already have an image running in their head, where your parents must have not agreed to your relationship and therefore forced you into marrying someone else. Even if you have been single throughout your life, they doubt that you have been in several relationships and that’s why your parents must have got fed up of you.
There can be no perfect answer to this question because any answer will lead them to creating stories.

Related reading: Why finding a match in arranged marriage can be like F1 racing

3. How much dowry?

Every girl will have to answer no matter how good or educated the guy’s family is. They might as well need a list of what all you have received from the groom’s side as well. The best way to tackle this question is silence. Let them know that it is ultimately an illegal act and they shouldn’t bring it up.

Related reading: Arranged marriages and the interesting men I got to meet

4. Are your parents forcing you?

This question is asked with such a concern as if they are going to help us elope from the bizarre! Because if you have opted for an arranged marriage then there is seriously some hidden truth behind it that you would not want to reveal. You can tell them that you have not been forced in any way and are pretty happy with the marriage but there are chances that they may not believe you!

5. How much does he earn?

This is asked by the people who really want to know whether the guy can keep you financially happy. These people think that a marriage can survive on the basis of money. You definitely do not need to answer this question as this is pretty personal. If in a humorous mood, you can tell them that he earns enough to buy the entire planet! They may get offended but again, does it matter?

Arranged marriages in India is a very complex topic for both the families and with such questions, these gossipmongers make it more complex. If someone really cares, they will just wish the best for you.
What was the worst question you got asked? Tell us in the comments section below.

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