Counselling

Should I marry the man I had a registered marriage with or the boy my parents select?

My love needs time to settle but my parents are looking for a match for me
sad lady thinking in night

Question

Hello ma’am,

Me and my love registered our marriage in our college days when I was just 19 and he was 21. His family knew it. Then after graduation both of us were working in the private sector. Later we left that job. Now he is in search of a government job and I’m running my own coaching classes from home.

My parents are planning an arranged marriage for me, so I have asked him to take a fast step from his side. He said that I should wait till he is stable. I understand that but what should I do now?

Also, from the 1st one and a half years we have been fighting a lot. I have started to think that we can’t stay together… He did many things which I do not like. He knew I wouldn’t like it but he still did them.

Our horoscope does not match either. I feel scared about that too.

It is a big risk. Should I choose my love or anybody else in my life… Thinking about all this I am depressed and distracted. Am unable to focus on my career either.

Please please please help me soon ma’am!

Relationship counselling

Related reading: I found the perfect lover and friend but our families were opposed to our marriage

Snigdha Mishra says:

Dear Young Lady,

I read your problem and have to say the following things to you.

First, you’re ‘already’ married to him.
Second, it’s your job to speak with your parents and not his.
Third, relationships are built gradually, fighting is normal.
Fourth, you’re yet to live together and build a home and a life together.
Fifth, did you match your horoscope when you registered your marriage at the age of 19? I assume not.

So I don’t quite understand what the issue is.

You’ve told me it’s a big risk and what must you choose. But haven’t you already chosen and are legally married to him?
Snigdha

These are some things couples should discuss before they start living together

We had a love marriage that we fought for but now he’s abusive


 

consult here native

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