Women are raised to protect and nurture, and this essentially forms the basis of their being. Just like how a mother protects her baby all the time, some women take the same instincts into relationships as well. Being overprotective is a trait that many women exhibit, without realising it is actually harming their relationship.
A man in a relationship with an overprotective girlfriend may feel he is dealing with his mom, all over again, and has no independence to live his life on his own. At first it feels like she cares and loves you and that is why acts obsessively; might as well feel good for sometime, but after a while, it becomes too much to take on. Life becomes a nagging affair and one feels suffocated.
Just like how a mother protects her baby all the time, some women take the same instincts into relationships as well.
Reminds me of my mom while I was a teenager. So glad to have passed that!
15 signs of an overprotective girlfriend
Someone who gets jealous instantly, and who watches your every move can make a man feel suffocated. And when she is not around, you know you will be questioned for every minute spent apart. It can be quite a nuisance having a girlfriend who wants to know what were you doing, where you are going, when you will be back, who are you spending time with and the list goes on and on.
Overprotective girlfriends control their partner’s life depending on their degree of obsessiveness. They are mostly unpredictable, and change their way of things according to their own whim and fancy. There comes a time when all the nagging starts to feel like your mother coming alive in her. And if you do identify with any of these signs, take them as a warning, my dear friend, and rush to someplace safer!
1. Your word is the ultimatum – do not mess with the clock!
A girlfriend who is overprotective would always expect you to honour your word and stick to deadlines. If you said you will be home by 9 pm, make sure you are there. A 15-minute delay can cause her mental distress, which will have to be borne by you.
If you are late (poor you) make sure you let her know well in advance if you do not want to have a miserable time ahead.
Related reading: Confessions of a jealous girlfriend
2. She constantly texts or calls you when you are not with her
Expect multiple calls and texts from her when you are away. And you better respond, else she will start to behave furiously and keep on overthinking. Her insecure mind feels the need to be constantly connected with you.
And, no, just reading the message is not enough, you have to reply too. We suggest you have a chauffeur to drive you around so that you can stick to the phone.
3. She often suspects you of cheating on her
Being insecure, she constantly feels that any time you spend apart from her implies you are with another woman and are cheating on her. This insecurity may stem from her past relationships or her clingy behaviour, but her fear of losing you keeps her accusing you of finding someone better.
4. She checks your phone and your computer without your permission
Because she always suspects you are having an affair, she would miss no opportunity to check your texts and calls and jump to conclusions. She will read between the lines and even a polite exchange of texts with another woman could spark her off.
She will often ask you for your passwords and scrutinise all your conversations. If you refuse, she may accuse you of hiding something.
5. She stalks all your social media profiles
Your social media profiles will be in her radar. She will question you on every like and comment, so much so that you may want to go off social media. Any interaction with a woman friend is sure to spell trouble, and comments that she may not agree with may have to be deleted.
You may feel as if you have no control on your life, and this will make you go crazy after a while.
6. To get to the truth, she asks you the same question in different ways
An overprotective girlfriend constantly feels that you are hiding something from her. If she asks you a question, she will never feel satisfied with the answer – because she is expecting something else. In her attempt to get to her version of ‘truth’, she will ask the same question in different ways and even on different occasions. Her idea is to confuse you and get to change your statements.
7. You never get a guy’s night without her
A guy’s night is totally off-limits with a woman who is obsessive. She feels that guys’ nights are just excuses for cheap thrills and banging bimbos. Even if she knows your friends well, she would still label them as lechers. If you wish to have a guy’s night, she accompanies you and defeats the very essence of having a guy’s night.
That is probably why your friends are not calling you up anymore.
8. You can never have a woman friend with her in your life
You should have seen this coming. Every man may have had stressful moments on having a woman friend, but with an overprotective girlfriend, it is an absolutely different story. She may be nice on the face of other women, but will accuse you of cheating. She will question the character of such women, and label them as ‘man-snatchers’. It will be impossible to talk to a co-worker, friend or even a cousin – and you might as well suffer greatly, losing your women friends.
9. She wants to be your first priority – over and above anyone else
Your first priority should be her. She will keep on demanding her place in your life and tell you how much she has sacrificed for this relation. She will keep score and make you feel that you are what you are because of her, so she should be your first priority, always.
She feels that she owns you rightfully, and so there should be no one else who gets your time or attention.
10. You can never talk about other women in front of her
You cannot meet other women, and you cannot even talk about them. If you appreciate anyone in front of her, all hell will break lose.
And comparison? Dude, you do love your life, don’t you?
Don’t even dare compare your overprotective girlfriend to anyone in the world, no matter how successful or big the name is. You will have to bear the brunt for many days and weeks afterward.
11. She eavesdrops on your conversations with friends and family
The concept of privacy is alien to your girlfriend. She insists on knowing everything you talk about to anyone. If you are on the phone, she will probably be around to listen, and if she cannot listen, she will ask you hundreds of questions.
She will always want to know what you said, what the other person said, and what the conversation was about. It does not matter if you were talking to a friend or your family. She will question what you were talking about even if it was your mom on the phone!
12. She constantly wants your attention
Being insecure, she will constantly seek your attention. She will ask you how she is looking a dozen times. She will go shopping frequently and try to imitate anyone she feels you like. She will ask you to affirm your affection for her again and again. Her fear of losing you will keep her trying to impress you and vow you.
And, if you do not acknowledge her efforts, be prepared for some bad meltdowns.
13. She may even stop by to check on you at office
Just to be sure, she may drop by your work place suddenly to check on you. She will pretend she was passing by and thought of having a coffee with you, but her real motive is to make sure you are in the office by yourself. She will scrutinise your colleagues, and try to sniff around.
She will question you about your female colleagues and will not like anyone at all.
14. There is no end to her questions, ever
An overprotective girlfriend keeps on asking questions and interrogating because she needs to have all details about you. Every second you spend apart needs to be accounted for. And every second you are with her she wishes to know what you are thinking. Gradually, these questions will become too much to handle.
She even tries to put words in your mouth by trapping you in questions like – “Do you find her pretty?” or “Was she looking good?” And freaks out when you answer, no matter what you say.
15. She never trusts you
An insecure, obsessive woman does not know how to trust anyone. Her insecurities make it impossible to go ahead in her relationships with trust. Because of this, she will end up damaging you, the relationship and herself.
And you-you are now always afraid of her.
No matter how many times you have proven to be trustworthy, she will never get it.
Being with an overprotective woman can be miserable, and quite hard to deal with. While some men may enjoy the importance, some may feel choked all the time.
The best is for you to decide, on how much you can take. If you feel you can commit to such a woman, then good, else it is best to call it quits and say goodbye.