The single vs dating conundrum is one that has existed for the longest time. From movies to books to even your next door neighbor — we are inundated with opinions regarding single hood or being in a relationship and which one of them is better.
Life while single vs life while dating someone can be two worlds apart.
A single life brings many freedoms but there are so many more things you have to consider when you’re dating someone. No longer are you your own master and only responsible for your own self. You can no longer let yourself go on the grooming front, you must look decent for your s/o. Money seems to flow out of your hands like water (most millennials complain about this) but at least you get laid regularly, right?
That being said, there are pros and cons to both. Moreover, it all comes down to the phase of life you’re in. Some people are single not because they can’t find someone, but because they choose to be. So before we label one as bad and the other as good, let’s take a closer look at the single vs dating concepts some more.
Single — Pros And Cons
Whether staying single by choice or not, the pros and cons apply to everybody! So if you aren’t happily single and are on the lookout for a partner, here are a few pros to make the best of the golden period in your life. But to weigh things fairly, we have also listed a few cons so you know exactly what you’ve signed up for.
|1. Complete freedom: The biggest reason why one chooses the singles’ side in the single vs dating debate is this one. When one is single, they don’t feel the need to please anyone and don’t have to make compromises in a relationship. They can always do as they please and design life the way that they want.||1. You crave intimacy sometimes: Sometimes it’s nice to have someone’s hand to hold, somebody to cook for and somebody who can drive you to work in the morning and give you that kiss on the forehead. Being single can be hard for some as you tend to miss all these things about being in a relationship.|
|2. You can focus on yourself: If your career has been picking up lately or you have been too busy taking care of your parents, being single can help you focus on those things better. So if you have other and bigger priorities on your plate that need more attention, then consider staying single by choice.||2. The social pressure is hard to deal with: We’ve come far as a society, but we still do have a really long way to go. People who are single (especially women) are still looked down upon. If you have the fire in you to give it back to people at social events who sneer at you, then good for you! But not everyone can deal with the pressure.|
|3. You can flirt around and have great one-night stands: Just because you’re single doesn’t mean that you spend every evening knee-deep in work or watching a movie on your couch all by yourself. You could spend your evenings at a bar picking up someone, indulging in some healthy flirting and having great sex.||3. You don’t have that one person to rely on: When it comes to fixing a plumbing problem or cleaning the snow in your backyard, you will have to do these things mostly on your own. But when you have a partner, there is always somebody to share the burden and chores with.|
Related Reading: 18 Ways To Show Someone You Care
Dating — Pros And Cons
On the other side of the single vs dating debate, there lies the entire arena of dating with it’s own set of advantages and disadvantages. Remember, whether single or dating, both can bring good things as well as a few hurdles in your life.
|1. You learn a lot about yourself too: Seeing yourself through the eyes of another person who genuinely cares about you, can be a phenomenal learning experience. They might bring out a side of you that you didn’t even know existed. For example, you could be dating an artist who brings out the artistic side in you that you never nurtured before.||1. It can make you jealous and possessive: Being invested in someone can be exhausting and may even hurt sometimes. When you are that close to somebody, it is only natural that there will be instances where you feel jealous, are possessive about them or will get hurt by the little things that they do.|
|2. It reduces stress: Yes, it absolutely does. Simply hugging it out a few times a day can reduce stress significantly. And if you have a partner to do that, things just get easier from there.||2. You will have to overlook their bad qualities: It’s not possible to like everything about everyone that you meet. So if your girlfriend never uses a coaster under her beer at home, you’ll probably have to remind her a few times until you realize that there’s nothing you can do about it and just live with it.|
|3. It teaches you tolerance and commitment: Yes, dating someone can actually make you stronger as a person. Navigating the challenges of relationships, tackling arguments and learning communication skills, are all advantages of dating.||3. Their constantly being around can getting suffocating: Them texting you every time you are out on a girls’ night out, calling them up whenever your flight lands safely – you know the drill. This constant hovering of theirs can get suffocating after a point.|
Single Vs Dating — A Few Ways In Which Life Changes
Well, you can no longer jam to “Single Ladies” by Beyonce, without feeling a little guilty, for starters. This is only one of the many differences between single and dating. Now that we’ve assessed the pros and cons of both, let’s look into what a transition from a happily single life to a happily committed life can be like.
1. Having to groom
When you’re single you lie back and let the hair grow all over your legs and your chest. Your make-up kit or hair mousse is probably lying covered in cobwebs. And you don’t mind wearing the same t-shirt that you wore yesterday.
You can be a little lax when it comes to your personal appearance and personal ahem…hygiene; things that you really cannot afford to do when you’re dating someone and have to spend time with them in close quarters. If you do, they might just nag you about it non-stop!
When you’re dating, you cannot decide between your maroon backless dress or between a simple tee and jeans when you’re supposed to go on a date. Your hair must be perfectly kept – shiny and glossy as ever. And does it looks like someone needs a laser hair treatment?
Related Reading: 5 Types Of Girls In A Relationship
2. The money issue when single vs dating
This is one thing that changes immensely between single vs dating life, unfortunately.
As a single person, you even have residual balance in your account even though bank balance has four zeroes ahead of it. And why not? Single hood promotes financial success and financial freedom; you just have to spend enough for yourself.
“Not enough money”- This is what your thoughts are like when you’re dating. You can’t remember what it feels like having money to spend on yourself because more than half of your pay is spent on fancy dinners, or on Ubers.
And whatever is left goes on buying the perfect birthday or anniversary gift. Yeah, romance is great but you don’t remember anyone telling you how much it costs!
3. Your virtual life takes a hit
Your virtual life is pretty active when you are single. Social media is your constant partner. And also, stalking the hell out of the hot people out there is basically a hobby or even a bedtime ritual for most men and women.
You also end up spending some time on dating apps that keep you busy and glued to your phone at some point or the other. Your phone is pretty much your best friend when you’re single and it’s super fun too!
When you’re dating, you end up spending most of your social media time talking to your significant other and the rest of the time you’re with them in person. Your virtual life is suddenly on hold when you cross over to the relationship side of things, because you’re preoccupied being with the one you love. The virtual world just doesn’t hold the same appeal. You have no time to keep checking your phone for social media updates.
Related Reading: The Real Stories Behind Those Happy Social Media Posts
4. Single vs relationship — cue the fights and arguments
Dramatic scenes and episodes when you are single are almost negligible. They exist mostly among your girlfriends but that kind of drama can actually be interesting. But when assessing the single vs relationship dilemma, there is a lot more drama to be found when you’re in a relationship.
When single, you are the king/queen of your own world and you don’t have an obligation to answer someone’s, “Who were you talking to for so long?” — that’s how the relationship arguments start.
The difference between the number of times you get into fights when you’re single vs dating is enormous. A fight can just start out of the blue over something as trivial and silly as, “So, I found this strand of hair in my sink…” to “You didn’t even bother to answer my call.”
5. The frequency of sex increases when dating
You might think single-hood propels the frequency of casual sex but on most days, it’s just you, with no intention of going out, watching a game on your TV set with your hand in your boxers.
On the other hand, if you are up and about in your single hood days, the frequency a one-night stand is always an option for you. But finding someone you like enough to hook up with and then impressing them and turning it into a possibility, is a feat by itself.
If you’re in a healthy and stable relationship, your sex life could not be better. You’re both so into each other and almost always in the mood. You have reached an amazing level of comfort and know what you both like and what you don’t. This is a big pro we come across while comparing single vs dating life.
Is It Better To Be Single Or Dating Someone?
Clearly, single and dating are both different ways of live with many different things to offer. Depending on where you are — emotionally or financially — it is up to you to choose which one will suit you better.
Single vs dating life, each have their own set of pros and cons. There is no doubt that both are poles apart from each other, but you can’t really label one as better than the other. So take your pick whether it is staying single by choice or wanting to get into a long-term relationship. Remember, both can make you happy or sad depending on the way you look at it!
The answer to your ‘single vs relationship’ query can only be answered be you. Since both bring good and bad things to your life, it’s up to you to decide which one is better for you as a person.
Not necessarily. One can indulge in casual dating where they could be seeing multiple people at once without any real commitment. By that metric, one is technically still ‘single’.
Why not? It most definitely can be! Learning how to love yourself, being alone and being self-sufficient can be great for one’s emotional health and well-being. Unless you spend every evening moping on your couch about how you’re single and alone — that’s not a very healthy way to do it.