How to stop being dependent in a relationship Q&A with Prachi Vaish

Do you think you are needy in your relationship? In a Facebook live session, the counsellor of Bonobology and renowned couple therapist, Prachi Vaish explains how to be not dependent on a relationship.

What causes you to become dependent on a relationship?

It’s not uncommon to need the person you’re spending your significant amount of time with. At some point, needing a person might begin to hurt you. When you start to become too dependent on them, you often need them to do some particular things for you. Failing which, you become disappointed in your partner and you have negative feelings about how heavily you’ve started to be reliant on them.

What should you do to not become dependent on your partner or on the relationship?

To begin with, make sure that you have realistic expectations from your partner. Surely, a relationship is a balance of efforts from both sides but not all the time. Sometimes you might not feel like giving your 50% or vice versa. At those points, it’s important that your partner and you are willing to change the give and take ratio a little bit. If you feel you’re dependent on him and he’s unable to provide you with what you need, then you should communicate freely and openly to him.

Taking a step back and realistically assessing your relationship and your demands is also necessary. Wanting your partner is not a bad thing at all. But sometimes your partner might fail to give you what you are seeking from them and that should be okay too. They might possibly be stuck in some of their own problems and will most definitely come around when they can. So there must always be some patience and room for him and you to grow together. Failing expectations sometimes shouldn’t be a breaking point for either one of you.

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