Well this is my story, the story in many homes probably.. my mil has 2 sons.. the elder one happens to be my hubby. she’s brought them up in a good way.. my bil being the younger one was pampered to the core as a child, and even today he is. Be it my fil or mil, he happens to be spoon fed, even after he’s married.. and his wife – my co-sister never minds this attention and pampering he gets. In fact she takes advantage of it herself.. But I’m not like that. I thought it was my responsibility to look after my husband since the day we got married. But I forgot and was unknown to the words called “Mamma’s Boy”. Ours was a love cum arranged marriage and so was brother in law’s. He got married at an early age – 26, but was still not much settled in life.. he wasn’t very sure about his future.. what is he going to be 10 years down the lane… (he has his father to spoon feed him).. he ventured into many things, on the other hand my hubby a very hard working man, always faced difficulties, things were never easy for him no matter where he went, but he has the grit to get through the situation.
Coming to the daughters in law, I completed my graduation and studied further before i got into corporate world. Got married, settled down, got pregnant after 1.2 years of wedding.. the ideal daughter in law probably.. wait… I wasn’t actually.. the problem is I’m not at all diplomatic… too straight forward and I just don’t believe in back biting, be it whoever. This wasn’t taken well by my family. They all blamed my mother, who was so too.. Seriously, I mean, grow up..
Fast forward 3 years, the 2nd daughter in law of the home arrives and she’s just the opposite.. very polished and diplomatic in all ways.. We all welcomed her with an open heart, at least I did. Since I was a stay at home mom by then, the morning kitchen responsibility was mine, with help from mil and co-sis of course. I used to pack her lunch box even with all the love, just like I would do for my sister. I longed for one, since i was a single child. But I could not see the same from her. Was i expecting too much or was she practical? I never got an answer to my question. I continued to fulfill my duties, yet i was not preferred over a period of time just because I was too straight forward..
My fil is a principled man, very good at heart and he’s been more than a father to me. He used to pick me up from my workplace when I was pregnant, his workplace was close to mine. We share a very good rapport. Mil on the other hand is very good at heart, but may be she feels somewhere down the line she’s lost her hold on her son’s since the arrival of daughters in law. She prefers my co-sister many a times just because she gives her more importance and makes her feel important.. But I never want to compete, and I believe neither does my co-sis. But why does such relationships need to have preference and comparisons. Each relationship is different and so is each person, his/her approach towards life and other people in their life. But after almost 10 years of being married, my co-sister remains the favourite in many aspects and I’m happy the way I’m. I don’t want to change my life’s philosophy for anybody. I want my son to grow up in a non comparative family. Well, may be again I’m expecting too much, time will tell.