Humour

The Penis Diaries Chapter 4: Ms. Vag gets pretty upset

A series from the point of view of that supreme object of man's obsession, his penis
Handsome man in glasses

If you need an introduction to the protagonist, read his story here and here. And a further episode here.

Big John and Jenny decide to take things forward. But it was not a walk in the garden (pun unintended again).

It would be an understatement to say, I have never felt so unwelcome in my entire life!

Seems Jenny’s Ms Vag wasn’t really expecting me, and definitely not accepting me. She found me an intruder it seems, for she slammed all doors shut to keep me out.

I tried, I pleaded and begged for entrance into the mystical world of a love hole. But that stupid c*&t was in no mood to relent. I knocked, I slipped and made a fool of myself for quite some time but no success!

Finally after Big John showed a lot of love and calmed Jenny a bit, I found some headway. But hardly had I moved an inch that Jenny screamed in pain. I went lifeless that moment. Trust me it’s difficult to stay up after seeing someone in pain.

Big John and Jenny were both disappointed. So was I and I believe the usually coochie Ms. Vag was pretty upset too. But we all decided that day that we will make it work and Big John promised to himself he will be as gentle and loving as he can be! I resolved to be as friendly as possible too.

Numerous date nights, and goofing around later we had another encounter.
Let me begin the description of that particular encounter with a vote of thanks

Thanks to the dude/dudette who
• made Google (lots of sex ed there)
• put those sex ed and relationship stuff online
• made that lube,
• produced that wine
• made the lovely music

And thanks to the Almighty, Jenny and Big John, it finally happened!
From my point of view, it’s pretty dark inside, so I just closed my eyes and focused on feeling every bit of it! It felt magical, but little did I know that the magic had just begun.

humour

Every precious moment of it, the feeling bettered, it was like I was accumulating pleasure – enormous quantities of it – more than I could ever handle. Sensations that I can barely describe, but I was in trance and so was every other part of Big John’s body. We had all drifted apart and then I exploded. It was a release like never before. Simultaneously somehow Jenny and Ms Vag reciprocated. It was like many volcanoes erupting at the same time, and something sucking at all that energy eventually draining us off everything material and leaving us with pure spiritual bliss!

I learn from experience that while each time is good, this one was special. Timed in perfect unison – a fate seldom achieved.

This one definitely goes at the top of my pole of fame!

 

A girl who lost her virginity to a married man shares her experience

5 women confess how their first time sex was

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