How cussing became a sign of the undignified
It was recently found that people who swear a lot might be more intelligent than others. They certainly seem more expressive than others and they just make any conversation feel more real. To be honest, the way swearing is looked down upon across the globe is a sign of the remaining Victorian morality, which was hypocritical, a fact that is well established. The idea that swearing is bad was tied up with the idea that it makes you an undignified member of society not worthy of the standards of the monarchy, and therefore the act was considered that of an unrefined person.
Gender roles and their hypocrisy make cussing complicated
Add a woman who cusses to the mixture and it suddenly became about virtue, not just of the woman but also the society. Women have always been made into people who have to uphold the moral standards and therefore have to behave in a stricter moral code than the men. This is part of the reason why a woman smoking a cigarette offends people more, even if it’s none of their damn business. A woman who cusses, therefore, is often perceived as a ‘bold’ woman – a loaded term that brings into question her morality and virtues. The same rules, of course, don’t apply to the men, who if they cuss are hotheaded studs who are just cooler when they swear.
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‘Oh you cuss in spite of being a girl?’
While this obvious sexism is not thought of with clarity, it is often one of the thoughts men have when their girlfriend cusses (women do have this same thought but we’re talking about men specifically here). The line ‘Tu ladki hokar bhi galiyan deti hai’ (You cuss in spite of being a woman’), is said admiringly or in surprise without realising how ridiculous and bigoted that statement sounds. It takes for granted a man’s right to cuss, as if saying ‘fuck you’ loudly is only possible because of the male anatomy! We won’t even go into the gendered words used in cuss words, because that’s a whole new article in itself.
‘ A girl who cusses is attractive!’
Then there are the fetishisers. People who think it’s hot or cool or sexy or attractive when you cuss. Yes, I get it, someone who’s free with their expression is attractive, but sometimes guys find this cussing thing attractive to a point where it feels like they think cussing means a woman who’ll be easy. Someone they’ll be able to get with without much effort. Nothing could be farther from the truth, of course. Cussing doesn’t mean either of these things.
‘The logical reaction’
What cussing does mean, is that a woman likes to use words which are colourful, just the way a man does, and that is about it. There are, of course, good men who see this for what it is. When their partner cusses and says ‘Fuck yeah!’ they think ‘ Damn right!’ and move the fuck on because that’s the only logical reaction.
Overuse of swear words defeats the purpose
Another reaction a few men have to their lady swearing is one that is shared by many people about cussing in general. You see, cussing is great, it’s like seasoning for language, but if overused, the words of a person tend to get salty and just unpleasant. Swear words ought to be things that add oomph to one’s speech, not become crutches. When they do become crutches, most people tend to think that it makes a person, in this case, a woman’s speech sound immature and unimportant. If you look at language, it was created to express emotions and swear words are meant to highlight the emotions. Use them too much and it becomes like crying wolf.
Swearing is for everybody!
Speaking about swearing in general, it is a great tool when used with restraint. Unfortunately, due to the hypocrisy of gender roles, the simple of act of emphasising while speaking becomes political. Men sometimes think their girlfriends’ swearing is unladylike, because of their societal conditioning. They sometimes also don’t give a fuck and treat it like the swearing of any other person. And yet we all swear a lot on a daily basis. Swearing is a phenomenon that is studied in linguistics. It is hated, frowned upon, celebrated by people of all genders across the world. What remains true through all of this is that, for those of us who don’t frown upon cursing, no matter what gender we are, it just feels fucking great.