How do you deal with the people who created your husband?
Those of you blessed with adjusting, liberal and loving in-laws, this piece is not for you.
For the rest of us, 99.999%, here are some handy tips.
Avoid being collateral damage in the war between your in-laws and the home staff
Be generous with your wallet, very generous. These two will never see eye-to-eye, so instead of trying to get them to bond, incentivise the house help to stand down with the help of Gandhi ji!
Avoid the prison of emotional blackmail
Next time your holiday plans abruptly get cancelled with the guilt of the ever present “I don’t know how many days I have left with you”, take measures to increase those days. No more laddoos for the fathers-in-law whose hearts are giving out any minute now or saree shopping or exhibition hopping for the mothers-in-law whose knees are no longer up for it.
Avoid the influx of chachi saas ki behen ki nanad ki visits
If the visiting relatives are beyond second cousins, find a conveniently timed charity or pressing task to attend to which saves you from serving unlimited cups of tea and nashta as well as explains your absence during these mindless gossip sessions.
Their never-ending struggles with technology
Since they insist on being active smartphone users, their unskilled manoeuvring of WhatsApp and Facebook causes you to play technician more often than you would like. The solution to this is simple, have children. Pass on the responsibility to your offspring under the pretence of quality grandparent bonding time.
The unwanted critical feedback for all your actions
In their eyes you can’t seem to do anything right, be it making the perfect round roti or raising their grandchildren. To avoid being constantly compared and put down, do the same to them. Compare them to their siblings, friends and cousins. “Masiji ke haath ka sheera kitna tasty tha, I wish hum bhi bana sakte.”