I am a 33-year-old divorced lady and I don’t have my own family. I am ridiculed wherever I go. It might be friends or relatives. I am a bit low on self-confidence and I have seen people tend to give me unsolicited advice.
Why Am I Ridiculed Wherever I Go?
I have aunts who always laugh at my expense and tell me to do this and that when I never ask them for any kind of advice. I am more educated than they are, yet they always try to dominate me. My uncle teases me all the time and I can’t ever give it back to him, because I just can’t.
Related Reading: My Aunts Are Body Shaming Me And I Am Losing My Self Esteem
I just can’t give it back
I have not been brought up to be kind to others and I have been taught never to answer back to elders. So I keep mum but I fester inside. This always disturbed me. I always feel that something is lacking in my personality which makes people easily ridicule me.
I am depressed because of this. Please help. I need to know how I can tackle these people.
I understand it must be really difficult to be in an environment where you are constantly ridiculed by others. You have mentioned that it’s both friends and relatives that treat you this way.
While we cannot choose our relatives, we can, however, choose our friends.
Review your friendships
I would suggest reviewing your friendships and keep only those that help you grow as a person. If your friends are bringing you down, not respecting you and not having your best interest at heart, then it’s time to let go of such friendships. Since I don’t know the details of what they are saying, do take my words with some caution.
Related Reading: After Two Failed Marriages, I Have Lost My Confidence
There is power in silence
As for your aunt who provides unsolicited advice, if it is not helpful (which it doesn’t seem to be) listen to it from one ear and let it go from the other.
Don’t respond to the advice, be silent and let it go. There is a lot of power in silence.
Now as for your uncle teasing you and for that matter anyone saying anything to you, we can’t change other people’s thoughts, behaviors, actions, reactions, etc. We can only control our reactions to such things.
You can work on your confidence
You have mentioned that you have low confidence and feel that you have something lacking in your personality which makes people ridicule you. This is something that can be worked on through therapy by understanding how it affects us. Therapy helps in working on the thoughts and emotions these invoke in us so that other actions and behaviors don’t impact us negatively. We need to learn to react more positively and in turn increase our confidence.
Every decision we make can change the course of our lives and we have the power to make positive decisions for a happier future.