Long-term, happy relationships don’t just happen. It’s not something you can wish upon and wait for a magic wand to make it all work out. Just the way you expect your significant other to be an ideal partner, you have to know how to be a better girlfriend. That’s because relationships require work and consistent effort to survive and thrive.
Let’s take a look at some of the top traits of a great girlfriend and how you can imbibe them in your relationship.
12 Actionable Tips on How To Be A Better Girlfriend
Ironically, love isn’t enough to make relationships last. So smothering someone with affection, cooking them their favorite meal or attending to their every need may not cut it. To be a better girlfriend, you don’t have to change who you are. The focus should be on strengthening your bond on a foundational level.
Here 12 actionable tips on how to be a better girlfriend will steer your efforts in the right direction:
1. Be confident in your own skin
Being unsure, uncomfortable and awkward with your personality traits is not uncommon. After all, societal constructs place too much pressure on women to aspire to nearly unattainable standards of perfection. There is nothing more vital to the success of your relationship than your sense of self-confidence.
Am I good enough? What do they really think of me as a girlfriend? Is my partner too good for me? Don’t let these doubts plague your mind. At the same time, don’t lean on your partner too much for assurances and reaffirmation of your self-image.
Your relationship is often a manifestation of your inner self. If you’re not confident about who you are, you’ll inevitably bring insecurity and unhappiness to your relationships. That’s definitely not the way to go if you want to be a better girlfriend.
Related Reading: 8 Ways To Fix A Broken Relationship With Your Boyfriend
2. How to be a better girlfriend to your boyfriend? Appreciate him
It’s a mistake to think that your partner does not have vulnerabilities. Your man may put the tough guy act, but underneath that strong exterior is a person riddled with the same insecurities, fears, needs and expectations as you.
Your appreciation can work wonders for his self-confidence, and make him feel loved and cherished in the relationship. Remember everyone likes to hear good things about themselves, their gender notwithstanding. Want to know how to be a better girlfriend to your boyfriend? Start by being more appreciative of him.
However, don’t make your compliments seem forced or insincere. Just make it a point to acknowledge his efforts and personality traits often.
3. By building trust you can be the best girlfriend in the world
Lack of trust in a relationship is a recipe for disaster. Nothing pushes a person away more than the realisation that they’re constantly being doubted. Whenever trust is lacking in a relationship, bitterness, bickering and nagging find a way in. That’s certainly not a happy situation for anyone involved.
So focus on building trust and you can be the best girlfriend in the world. When you trust your partner, you can give them space to thrive as an individual without feeling insecure. You could both spend days apart without obsessing over who your partner is talking to or hanging out with.
Such relationship dynamics are a catalyst for positivity and growth, allowing you to build a bond that will stand the test of time.
4. Focus on personal growth
Nothing knocks the wind out of a relationship faster than the expectation that you and your partner will always be joint at the hip. This is particularly important if you’re in a long-term relationship or a cohabitating couple.
The best way to be a good live-in girlfriend is to focus on your personal growth as much as you focus on your relationship. Learn to enjoy some ‘me time’ and give you partner some personal space to do their own thing.
Perhaps, pick up a hobby that you can pursue on your own. Or make the time to hang out with your friends.
Invest in nurturing your body, mind and personality. Trust us when we tell you that no balanced, reasonable person wants to be with someone whose life begins to revolve solely around their relationship.
5. Listen intently to be a better girlfriend emotionally
Women know the feeling of speaking but not being heard all too well. If you’ve experienced it, then you know how bad that hurts. To be a better girlfriend emotionally, make a conscious effort to ensure that if your partner has something to share, you hear them out patiently.
Perhaps they had a bad day at work or got into an argument with a friend or sibling, and have come to you feeling awful about it. For most people, sharing such unpleasant feelings is extremely uncomfortable.
So, create an environment where your partner feels comfortable in letting their anxieties, insecurities and negative emotions bare. When you need to vent, they’ll surely return the favor.
Related Reading: 5 Tips To Introduce Your Boyfriend/Girlfriend To Your Parents
6. Encourage them to follow their dreams
How do I start being a better girlfriend? What are girlfriend duties? If you’ve pondered on these questions, you’re surely invested in your relationship and value your partner. You obviously see a lot of good qualities and potential in them.
Be the girlfriend, who encourages the love of her life to chase their dreams. Help your partner achieve their true potential. When they find you standing by their side in a crowd of naysayers, they’ll appreciate you even more.
7. Be a better girlfriend by embracing the people in their life
Your partner had a life before you. Friends, family, sibling – their inner circle of people who they care about deeply. In order to be a better girlfriend, you must embrace these people rather than holding it against your partner for still wanting to hang out with them.
Go to that Sunday brunch with their family or that weekend getaway with their friends. A relationship, particularly if you’re thinking long-term, extends beyond the two people involved. You have to make the effort to blend in, get along and embrace your partner’s inner circle.
8. How to be a better girlfriend in a long-distance relationship? Be faithful
Well, not crossing the boundaries of faithfulness is critical for the survival of any relationship. But even more so when you and your significant other don’t live in the same city. Distance makes temptations more overpowering.
You will need to channelize every ounce of self-control to make sure you don’t end up cheating physically or emotionally.
This is hands down the most vital aspect of how to be a better girlfriend in a long-distance relationship. Being faithful isn’t just avoiding the slippery slope of sleeping around or having an affair on the side. It’s also about creating relationship secure enough that there is no room for jealousy.
9. Don’t compete for their attention
A common mistake that a lot of women make in relationships is to compete for their partner’s attention. Competing with their friends, their family, their hobbies and even their jobs. If you want to know what are the qualities of a good girlfriend, then not being a constant attention-seeker definitely makes the cut.
Every person has different aspects of their life and a whole gamut of relationship. You cannot replace them all. Neither should you try to. Know that your place in their life is unique, and no other relationship can take away from that.
You will be able to embrace this fact only when you feel completely secure in your relationship. When that happens, you will also be able to encourage your partner to nurture these other aspects of his existence.
10. How to be a better girlfriend? Keep the spark alive
Yes, it is not solely upon you to achieve that. However, you should do your bit to keep the romance and spark alive in your relationship. Try something new in bed every once in a while. Surprise them with a dinner date at their favorite restaurant. Plan an exciting weekend getaway for their birthday.
These little moments away from the mundane everyday routine can infuse new energy in your relationship.
Related Reading: 15 Funny Ways To Annoy Your Boyfriend
11. Be their friend
Want to be the best girlfriend in the world? The solution is simple – become their best friend. Be the person they can share their deepest, darkest thoughts with without hesitation. And also the person they want to go drinking with. Someone with whom they can take the most fun trips and talk late into the night.
Become your partner’s buddy, their confidante, their secret-keeper. Be the girlfriend your partner can talk to about that hot girl in the bar without all hell breaking loose.
However, don’t let this friendship take away from the romance and passion in your relationship. Being friends with your significant other can be a tricky balance to strike. If you can achieve that, you’ll truly be in the most satisfying, secure and happy relationship of your life.
12. Give and Earn Respect to be a better girlfriend
Respect is an often-overlooked cornerstone of a strong, enduring relationship. To get respect, you have to give respect. And also become a person who inspires respect in others. So, don’t be a pushover in your relationship – someone who’s ready to bend of backwards to please their partner.
At the same time, don’t berate your partner or humiliate them in public or even your private space. If you disagree with something they’ve done, convey your displeasure like a mature adult. Then, look for a way to solve the conflict. One-upmanship and blame-game are not the hallmarks of a healthy relationship.
Now, that you know how to be a better girlfriend, make sure you’re making the effort to be better for the right person and the right reasons.