He mea noa te kite i te ataahua o ētahi atu i a rātou e whai hononga ana? He tohunga hinengaro tohutohu Deepak Kashyap e mea ana he mea noa, he mea tangata hoki. Ina uru koe ki tētahi whanaungatanga takitahi, ko te whakapau kaha i waenga i ngā hoa ko te kore e takahi i te whakawhirinaki o tētahi ki tētahi, e kore hoki e whiti i te rārangi pono. 'Kāore rawa ahau e kite i tētahi e ātaahua ana' – ehara tēnā i te whakapau kaha.
I te mea e 75% o ngā hoa e tinihanga ana i tētahi wā, he mea nui kia whakaaroarohia: Kei te tinihanga rānei te whai kare ā-roto ki tētahi atu? I te mea kāore tō hoa e mahi ana i runga i tōna hiahia ki tētahi atu, he aha e kore ai e waiho hei āhuatanga noa – tata kore e taea te karo – o te tangata.
A te wā e manukanuka ai koe mō te mea 'kei te hiahia taku hoa tāne ki tētahi atu tangata, me aha ahau?', pātai atu ki a koe anō: kāore anō koe kia noho ki roto i tēnei te aroha me te whakahihi i taua wā anō. Tērā pea ko tāu whakautu he āe. Ki te pērā, tukua atu ki tō hoa te whai wāhitanga anō.
Ae, he mea whakapoauau te whakaaro ki te 'aroha ana taku hoa ki ahau engari kei te hiahia ia ki tētahi atu'. Engari ko te hiahia ā-ira ki tētahi atu i a koe e noho tahi ana kāore e rite ki te tinihanga mena ka mārama, ka whakaute hoki te tangata i ngā rohe kua whakatūria i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga.
Te pānui e pā ana: Kua aro atu ahau ki tētahi atu tāne, ā, kāore au e pouri ana
Ko te mutunga iho, kotahi te pātai: me aha mēnā kei te hiahia tō hoa ki tētahi atu? E toru ngā wāhanga matua o te whakahaere i tēnei āhuatanga: kāore he whakama, kāore he whakapae, me te nui o te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero.
Kāore e kore ka mamae te ngākau o tō hoa ki tētahi atu. Ko te huarahi hei whakaoti i tēnei raruraru ko te whakamārama i te mamae i roto i ngā horopaki, kaua e whakawhanuitia kia rite ki ngā ariā pāpori, ki ngā ariā whakakatakata rānei i tipu ake ai koe.
Te Kimi i tētahi Tangata Motuhake i muri i te Marena i roto i te Hoahoa
He whanaungatanga uaua: Kei te aroha ahau engari kei te kukume ahau ki tētahi atu?
Kua moe ahau, ā, e aroha ana ahau ki taku tāne, engari kei te aro tonu ahau ki taku hoa mahi
Kāore tō koha e kiia he kaupapa aroha takohaMā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata katoa o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.
