Amati akazi ndi odabwitsa, koma kuwerenga malingaliro a mwamuna sikuyendanso mu paki. Ngati muli paubwenzi wanthawi yayitali ndi mwamuna yemwe savala mtima wake m'manja, mwina mwakhala mukulakalaka chizindikiro 1, 2 kapena 6 chomveka bwino chomwe akufuna kukukwatirani. Kupatula apo, kusamvetsetsa komwe ubalewo ukulowera kungakupangitseni kukhala osatsimikiza komanso osakhazikika.
Ngati mwatopa kuyembekezera kuti anene mawu ambiri, kuyang'ana zizindikiro zomwe akufuna kuti akukwatireni mtsogolo ndiye kubetcha kwanu kotsatira. Ndipo tikhulupirireni, pali zizindikiro zambiri zazing'ono zomwe zingapangitse malingaliro anu kukhala omasuka.
Tisanafufuze mozama za zizindikiro zoti akufuna kukukwatira psychology, tiyeni tiwone kuti zimatengera nthawi yayitali bwanji kuti mwamuna adziwe kuti akufuna kukukwatira.
Zimatenga Nthawi Yaitali Bwanji Mwamuna Kudziwa Kuti Akufuna Kukwatiwa Nanu
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Mwamuna aliyense amachita zinthu mosiyana ndi mwamuna wake, choncho zimakhala zovuta kudziwa nthawi yomwe zimatengera mwamuna kudziwa kuti akufuna kukukwatirani. Choyamba, ayenera kukhulupirira kuti ukwati ndi wokonzeka. Ngati mwakhala pachibwenzi kwa nthawi yayitali ndipo kukambirana za ukwati sikunayambe, chifukwa chake mwamuna wanu sanakonzekere kukwatira.
Kuchokera ku chikondi poyang'ana koyamba mpaka kukhala limodzi kwa zaka zambiri musanasankhe kuyenda munjira, ulendo wa banja lililonse kuti mudziwe kuti apeza 'amene' ndi wosiyana. Koma ngati tikukamba za nthawi yomwe imatengedwa kuti asankhe ngati akufuna kukwatira kapena ayi, phunziroli limakhazikika pamasiku 172 kapena pafupifupi miyezi isanu ndi umodzi.
Malinga ndi kafukufukuyu, nthawi yaukwati muubwenzi imayamba kutha pakatha miyezi itatu. Apa ndipamene anthu okondana amayamba kuonana zolakwa za wina ndi mnzake. Zolakwika ndi zovuta izi nthawi zambiri zimakhala zomwe zimasankha ngati munthu amawona bwenzi lake lomwe ali nalo ngati bwenzi lapamtima - kapena m'mawu ena, 'ameneyo'.
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6 Zizindikiro Zomveka Kuti Akufuna Kukwatiwa Nanu
Ngati mwakhala limodzi kwa nthawi yayitali kupitirira nthawi ya ukwati , mutha kukhala otsimikiza kuti zolakwa zanu zapadera sizingasokoneze mgwirizano wa mwamuna wanu. Ichi chokha ndi chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zazikulu zomwe amadziona akukwatirana nanu nthawi ina.
Ngakhale zili choncho, kudikirira movutikira kuti afunse funso kungakuchititseni mantha za tsogolo la ubale wanu. Ikani malingaliro anu momasuka ndi zizindikiro 6 zomveka bwino zomwe akufuna kudzakwatirana nanu tsiku lina:
1. Amalankhula za tsogolo ndi inu
Chimodzi mwazizindikiro zomwe amakufunani m'tsogolo mwake ndi pomwe amalingalira ndikulankhula za tsogolo ndi inu. N’kutheka kuti sanagwadebe, koma dziwani kuti palibe kukaikira m’maganizo mwake ponena za kukhala ndi inu moyo wake wonse ngati zolinga zake zonse zamtsogolo zikukukhudzani. Zina mwazizindikiro zomwe mwamuna wanu akuwona tsogolo nazo ndi izi:
a. Amakamba za kukhala pabanja ndi inu
Ngakhale m'malingaliro, mwamuna wanu amangobwerezabwereza mawu akuti M ndipo amachita zimenezo mobwerezabwereza. Kaya ndi kukusekani za momwe mungaphikire chakudya cham'mawa m'mawa uliwonse mukakwatirana kapena kukonda kwambiri momwe moyo wanu waukwati udzakhalira. Kudziwa kuti akufotokoza izi m'makambirano ndi chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zomwe akuona kuti akukukwatirani.
b. Amakambirana nanu za kulera ana
Kukambitsirana kulikonse kozungulira ana kumawonetsanso kuti akuwona tsogolo ndi inu. Kodi zokambirana zanu zimakhala ndi zokambirana za ana angati omwe mungafune kukhala nawo? Kapena mukufuna kuwalera bwanji? Kodi mwafika poganiza za mayina a ana anu amtsogolo? Ngati inde, mulibe chodetsa nkhawa chifukwa izi ndizizindikiro zodziwikiratu kuti mnyamata akufuna kukwatira ndipo amadziona akukhala nanu moyo wake wonse.
c. Maloto okalamba pamodzi
Chizindikiro chinanso chodziwikiratu kuti akufuna kudzakwatirana nanu mtsogolomu ndikuti amalankhula nanu zamtsogolo. Mtundu wa nyumba yomwe akufuna kukalamba ndi inu pambali pake. Kapena mtundu wa moyo wopuma pantchito womwe mungakhale ngati banja. Ngati akuwonani m'moyo wake zaka 20 kapena 30 kuchokera pano, palibe kukayika kuti adzafunsa funso posachedwa.
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Kuti mumve zambiri zamakanema akatswiri chonde lembani ku Youtube Channel yathu. Dinani apa.
2. Ndinu gawo lofunika kwambiri la moyo wake
Munthu akagwa mchikondi moona, amatsegula mtima wake ndi moyo wake kwa SO wake. Chimodzi mwa zizindikiro 6 zomveka bwino zomwe akufuna kuti akukwatireni ndikuti mwakhala gawo lofunika kwambiri pazochitika zonse za moyo wake.
Ubale wanu suli chabe za iye ndi inu panonso. Anthu onse omwe amawakonda ndi gawo la moyo wanu komanso mosemphanitsa.
Mwamuna wanu akakupangani kukhala gawo lofunika kwambiri la moyo wake ndipo ngati akufuna kukwatira, amawonetsa m'njira izi:
a. Amakupangani kukhala gawo la banja lake
Mwamuna amene akufuna kukukwatira sanangokudziwitsani kwa banja lake koma amakuchitirani ngati kuti ndinu ogwirizana nawo kale. Kaya ndi chakudya chamadzulo chakuthokoza pa tsiku la kubadwa kwa makolo ake kapena mwana wa mphwake, amaona kuti ndi gawo la zochitika zonse za banja ndi kusonkhana.
Pakapita nthawi, inunso mwakhazikitsa ubale wodziyimira pawokha ndi achibale ake. Mumapita ndi amayi ake kukagula zinthu kapena kugawana mowa wozizira ndi abambo ake popanda kuwalimbikitsa. Ubwenzi wapamtima uwu ndi chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zotsimikizika kuti adzakufunsirani mtsogolo.
b. Amafuna kuti mupite naye kumalo ochezera
Phwando la Khrisimasi kuntchito. Chikumbutso cha abwana ake. Konsati. Gulu limayenda ulendo Lamlungu m'mawa. Amafuna ndipo amayembekeza kuti mukhale mbali ya mayanjano ake onse. Izi zikusonyeza kuti amayamikira kwambiri kukhala nanu pafupi.
Iye wayamba kukuonani inu monga theka lina la umunthu wake, amene amamukwaniritsa m’njira zambiri.
c. Amakuphatikizirani muzokonzekera ndi anzanu
Zoonadi, aliyense amakonda nthawi yokhala yekha ndi anzawo kuti aziwombera nthawi ndi nthawi. Koma mokulira, ngati akulowetsani m’zokonzekera zake ndi mabwenzi, mukhoza kuthetsa nkhaŵa za kumene chibwenzicho chikupita. Kuyambira kumapeto kwa sabata kumwa zakumwa mpaka ku zikondwerero zakubadwa ndi tchuthi, ngati mwakhala mbali ya bwenzi lanu ndi abwenzi nthawi zambiri zokwanira kukhazikitsa ubale ndi iwo, iye ndithudi mu izo kwa nthawi yaitali.
Angakonde ngakhale mwamseri mfundo yakuti inu ndi anzake mumagwirizana. Kwa iye, zikutanthauza kuti nonse mungakhalepo ngati gulu limodzi losangalala mukangokwatirana.
3. Amakukondani kwambiri
Inde, inu ndi mnzanuyo muyenera kukhala m’chikondi. Ndi chifukwa chake muli limodzi. Kulondola? Kupatula, sizikhala choncho nthawi zonse. Si zachilendo kuti anthu azingokhalira kugwirizana ndi anthu opanda chikondi, osaona mtima mpaka zinthu zabwino zitabwera.
Sizitengera Sherlock kuti azindikire izi. Ngati ubale wanu wapita patsogolo mpaka nonse mumamva kuti ndinu otetezeka komanso okhutira, pali mwayi wabwino kuti nonse awiri musankhe kukhala ogwirizana nawo posachedwa. Andy anali wotetezeka kwambiri m'moyo. Anali wokondwa pantchito yake, amakonda kukhala pafupi ndi makolo ake komanso ndi chikondi chake chatsopano Connie pakusakanikirana, moyo sunathe kumuyendera bwino. Zonse zitakhazikika ndikuyenda bwino, Connie adamupanga kukhala munthu wabwinoko ndikutulutsa zabwino mwa iye, tsiku lililonse.
Chifukwa chake, chikondi chokhalitsa chomwe chimakhalapo pakapita nthawi yayitali atapezana wina ndi mnzake chizilala ndi chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zomwe amadziwona akukukwatira. Andy atazindikira kuti sangachite bwino kuposa mkazi ngati Connie, sanafune nthawi yoti aganizire. Anayendetsa galimoto mpaka kunyumba kwake n’kumupempha kuti akwatirane naye. Ndiye mumadziwa bwanji chikondi chokhalitsachi chomwe chingakutsogolereni ku zizindikiro zoti akukonzekera kukwatirana nanu? Yang'anani zizindikiro izi:
a. Samayang'ana "okonda" ena
Kaya ali yekha kapena nanu, samangoyang'ana anthu ena okondana kwambiri omwe akudutsa kapena kuyang'ana zomwe zikubwera ngati zinthu sizikukuyenderani bwino. Ndipo mukuwona kuti safunikira ngakhale kuyesetsa kuti asayang'ane. Iye amakukondani kwambiri moti maganizo oti afufuze ena samamufika n’komwe.
b. Iye ndi wachikondi
Chizindikiro chinanso chimene akufuna kudzakwatirana nanu m'tsogolo n'chakuti amasonyeza kuti amakukondani nthawi zambiri ubwenziwo utatha. Amakupsompsonani nthawi zambiri, kumati 'ndimakukondani', akugwira dzanja lanu chifukwa, ndikuwonetsa kuyamikira kwake ndikugwirana mwachikondi.
c. Amasunga chikondicho
Chizindikiro china chomwe chimamuonetsa kuti akukufunani mtsogolo mwake ndi chakuti si inu nokha amene mukuyesetsa kuti chikondi chanu chikhalebe cholimba muubwenzi wanu. Nayenso mnzanuyo amakonza zoti mukumane ndi chibwenzi chanu, amakubweretserani maluwa, amakukopani, ndipo amachita zinthu zina kuti mtima wanu ukhale wosangalala nthawi ndi nthawi.
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4. Mumagawana kale moyo
Kukonzeka kwa mwamuna kugawana nanu moyo ndi chimodzi mwa zizindikiro 6 zomveka zomwe akufuna kukukwatira. M’chenicheni, iye wasankha kale zimenezo. Chinthu chokha chomwe chatsala ndikuyika mphete.
Nick atangokwanitsa zaka 29 ndikubwerera kuchokera ku Afghanistan, ubale wake wautali ndi Chloe udatha zaka zinayi zabwino. Tsopano popeza anali atabwerera kunyumba ndi kubwerera m'manja mwa Chloe, anali wokonzeka kuyamba kumuphatikiza m'moyo wake, monga bwenzi lake la moyo. Izi zikutanthauza chilichonse kuyambira kuphika mbale mpaka kutengera galu mpaka kukhalira limodzi!
Mukudziwa kuti nonse mukugawana moyo akamachita izi:
a. Wakhala nanu
Nonse mutakhala otsimikiza kukhala paubwenzi wodzipereka, sanawonetse kukayikira potengera zinthu zina. Kodi mwamuna amadziwa kuti akufuna kukukwatira liti? Mwina akafuna kuti ayese kukhala nanu kuti aone mmene mulili ngati banja lolimba. Anasamukira nanu mosazengereza. Kapenanso ndi amene ananena. Ngati ndi choncho, mwina akungodikira nthawi yoyenera kuti akufunseni funsolo.
b. Ndinu wolumikizana naye mwadzidzidzi
Ngati mwatchulidwa kuti ndi amene angakumane naye mwadzidzidzi, amakudalirani kuti akuthandizeni ndipo amadziwa kuti mudzakhala ndi msana wake nthawi zonse. Sikuti amangokhulupirira kuti mudzakhala pambali pake panthawi yake yovuta komanso samawopa kugawana nanu nthawi yomwe ali pachiwopsezo.
Kodi mungadziwe bwanji ngati akufuna kundikwatira? Inde, nthawi zina zimakhala zosavuta ngati kukhala munthu woyamba kulankhulana naye ngati atapezeka mu ER. Mulungu asalole kuti atero koma izi zikutanthauza kuti amakuonani ngati munthu woyamba kumusamalira. Izi ndi zizindikiro za ubale wabwino womangidwa pamaziko olimba. Ngati mwapeza zimenezo ndi mnzanu, ukwati suyenera kukhala vuto lanu. Ndi nkhani ya nthawi yoti mukambirane zambiri kuposa ngati.
c. Mutha kukhala nokha mozungulira wina ndi mzake
Kutsuka mano musanagone. Iye akugwira tsitsi lanu kumbuyo pamene inu mukuponya mutatha usiku wakumwa mowa mwauchidakwa. Kudula fart mokweza popanda chisamaliro padziko lapansi. Ngati mungakhale nokha mopanda manyazi, palibe chifukwa chokayikira kuti mudzakhala okwatirana.
5. Iye ndi inu amagawana chuma
Ndalama nthawi zambiri zimakhala zovuta kwa okwatirana. Zowonjezereka kwambiri pakati pa anthu osakwatirana. Ngati inu ndi mnzanuyo mwakhala mukupondaponda paulendo wogawana nawo zachuma, mukhoza kuziwerengera pakati pa zizindikiro zomwe amadziona akukwatira.
Ulendo wogawana nawo wazachuma ukhoza kukhala chimodzi kapena zonsezi:
a. Amakambirana nanu mapulani opulumutsa
Amakambirana nanu mapulani aliwonse osungira ndalama kapena ndalama musanapange chisankho. Izi zikutanthauza kuti amayamikira uphungu wanu ndipo amakuonani ngati gulu lomveka bwino ndipo akhoza kumasulira zizindikiro zomwe akufuna kuti akukwatireni posachedwa. Zikutanthauzanso kuti ndikofunika kwa iye kuti mukhale nawo pazigamulozi chifukwa zidzakukhudzani nonse mutangokwatirana.
b. Amagawana nanu ndalama
Izi sizikutanthauza kungopereka ndalama zothandizira banja osati kuti mukukhala limodzi. Koma munthu amene amaona kuti banja lake ndi lofunika kwambiri kwa iyeyo ngati mnzanu wa moyo wamtsogolo amalankhulanso za ndalama zina zomwe amawononga komanso zomwe amawononga. Ngati mukuona zimenezo muubwenzi wanu, zikutanthauza kuti mwamuna wanu wasankha kale kukwatirana nanu. Akugwira kale ntchito yomanga maziko abwino okonzekera bwino ndalama mtsogolo.
c. Amagawana nanu maakaunti aku banki ndi makadi a kirediti kadi
Mukuyang'ana zizindikiro zomwe akukonzekera kukwatira? Chabwino, izo sizikhala zowonekera kwambiri kuposa izi. Kodi mnzanu wakutsegulirani akaunti yakubanki yolumikizana nanu? Kapena anakuonjezerani ngati wowonjezera makhadi pa akaunti yawo ya kirediti kadi? Izi ndi zizindikiro zonse za momwe alili wovuta kwambiri paubwenzi ndipo adzautengera pamlingo wina pamene nthawi ikuwoneka bwino kwa iye.
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6. Iye akuponya malingaliro
Chizindikiro chodziwikiratu kwambiri mwa zizindikiro 6 zoonekeratu kuti akufuna kukwatira ndi pamene akuyamba kuonetsa zimenezo. Ndipo tikutanthauza zinthu zina zolemetsa. Zizindikiro zomwe akufuna kukwatira nanu tsiku lina zitha kuonekera kwambiri m'njira zotsatirazi. Choncho, samalani ndi mawu ake, zochita zake, ndi machitidwe ake. Ndipo mungapeze mawu obisika omwe akusonyeza kuti akukonzekera chibwenzi chodabwitsa kwa inu.
Carla adakhala pachibwenzi ndi Joey kwa zaka zingapo ndipo awiriwa akuganiza zosamukira limodzi. Koma Joey akukonzekera kulumpha mfuti ndikumufunsa kuti amukwatire nthawi yomweyo! Pokhala nyamata wodziwikiratu, adapitiliza kunena ndikuwuza kuti awiriwa ayende limodzi ulendo waufupi wopita ku Vegas ndipo tonse tikudziwa kuti ma chapel a Vegas ndi chiyani. Pambuyo pa sabata yamawa, awiriwa adakwatirana mosangalala usiku wonse ndipo Carla sankadziwa kuti kuthawa kwawo kwa sabata kudzabweretsa zodabwitsa izi!
Kotero ngati mukuyesera kuti mutenge zizindikiro zomwe akufuna kuti akukwatireni posachedwa, samalani kwambiri ndi zomwe angakupatseni. Simukudziwa choti muyang'ane ndendende? Inde, pali zizindikiro zingapo zomwe muyenera kuziganizira:
a. Amakufunsani za ukwati wamaloto anu
Ngati ali wokonzeka kukwatiwa ndipo watsala pang'ono kufunsira, zokambirana zaukwati zidzachoka pamalingaliro ngati 'liti' ndi 'ngati' kupita ku mafunso achindunji komanso achindunji okhudza mapulani aukwati. Izi ndizizindikiro zonse zomwe angafune mtsogolomu - ndipo tikutanthauza mtsogolo posachedwa.
Akhoza kukufunsani lingaliro lanu la ukwati wamaloto. Kapena ndikufunseni kuti musankhe pakati pa ukwati wa tchalitchi kapena kopita, ukwati wapamtima kapena waukulu. Kapena, ngati mukumva kapena kumuzindikira akukonzekera zokumana nazo zopenga kapena ulendo wokondwerera tsiku lobadwa, zitha kukhala chimodzi mwazizindikiro zomwe angakufunseni pa tsiku lanu lobadwa!
b. Akuwoneka kuti akukonzekera zinazake mobisa
Kodi mwawona okondedwa anu akusangalala ndi anzanu kuposa masiku onse? Kodi amathera nthawi yambiri atadzitsekera m'chipinda yekha ndikukuletsani kuyenda mosadziŵika? Kodi wapita kokagula yekha? Chifukwa zinthu zing'onozing'onozi zikhoza kukhala zizindikiro zoti akufuna kukukwatira posachedwa ndipo akukonzekera zomwezo.
Chabwino, tikupangira, nanunso muyambe kukonzekera, chifukwa lingaliro lalikulu likubwera. Pezani zovala zanu, nsapato, zowonjezera, kuti mukhale okonzeka kumusangalatsa ngakhale pang'ono.
c. Akukufunsani za size yanu ya mphete
Kodi mungadziwe bwanji ngati akufuna kundikwatira? Ngati izi zachitika ndi inu, palibe kukayika kuti akufuna kukwatiwa. Kodi mwafunsapo mosasamala za kukula kwa mphete yanu ? Kodi wakhala akukufunsani mafunso okhudza kudula kwa diamondi komwe mumakonda? Chifukwa ngati watero, ndiye kuti adzakugulirani mphete - ndipo posachedwa!
Ngati mutha kuwona zizindikilo 6 zomveka bwino zomwe akufuna kukwatira muubwenzi wanu, timamva mabelu aukwati mtsogolo mwanu. Dzikonzekereni nokha paulendo wamoyo wonse!
Ibibazo
Ngati akulankhula za tsogolo ndi inu komanso zolinga za moyo wake wakutali zikuphatikizani inu, mungakhale otsimikiza kuti akufuna kukukwatirani. Kwangotsala nthawi kuti afunse funso.
Ngati mwamuna wanu wakulandirani m'mbali zonse za moyo wake - kunyumba kwake, chikhalidwe chake, bwenzi lake, banja, ntchito - samangoganizira za inu komanso amakuonani ngati bwenzi lanu lamoyo.
Eya, ngati akulankhula nanu za tsogolo, kukambitsirana za mmene kudzakhala kukhalira pabanja, kukhala ndi ana, kukalamba pamodzi, mungakhale otsimikiza kuti akufuna tsogolo ndi inu.
Mwamuna aliyense amachita mosiyana paubwenzi, choncho zimakhala zovuta kufotokoza nthawi yomwe mwamuna ayenera kumufunsira. Kukambitsirana mwachindunji ndi wokondedwa wanu za zolinga zake za ukwati kungakupatseni chimvekere bwino pankhaniyi.
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