Me murua e au taku tāne mō tana tinihanga?

I moe tāku tāne mō ngā tau 15 ki tētahi o tana tari. E rua marama te roa o tēnei, ā, i kitea e au nā te mea i tirohia e au tana waea. I mea ia kua mutu tana mahi, ā, he hapa. Engari kāore au i te tino mōhio mēnā ka whakapono ahau ki a ia. He kōwhiringa te tinihanga, ā, kāore e tupu noa iho. Heoi, kua hanga tahi māua i tētahi oranga katoa. Tokorua ā māua tamariki, he tama 12 tau te pakeke, he tamāhine 10 tau te pakeke. Kua noho tahi anō māua i ētahi wā tino harikoa. Me murua e koe te tangata tinihanga? Kāore au i te tino mōhio ki hea ka tīmata. Kei te hiahia tētahi wāhanga o ahau ki te mōhio ki ngā kōrero katoa, engari i ia wā ka kōrero mai ia i tētahi mea mō rātou, ka pakaru tōku ngākau. Kāore e taea e au te tuku i a ia kia pā mai ki ahau me te kore e whakaaro ki tana mahi i taua mea anō ki a ia. Ka taea rānei te neke atu i tēnei? Tena koa, kōrero mai ki ahau me pēhea taku murunga i taku tāne mō tana tinihanga. I ētahi wā ka whakaaro ahau he tika ki ahau te mea pai ake, ā, e hiahia ana ahau ki te whakamutu i te marena. Engari i ētahi wā ka kite ahau kua maha ngā tau whakamiharo kua noho tahi māua, ā, kaua e maka noa atu nā te moe tāne kotahi. E ai ki taku tāne ka taea e ia te mahi i ngā mea katoa hei whakatika i ngā mea.

Pānui e pā ana: Kei te kōrero tonu taku tāne ki te wahine i tinihangatia ahau e ia

whakahoki:

He wheako mamae te tinihanga, ā, ahakoa he maha ngā tāne me ngā wāhine e whiriwhiri ana ki te wehe i muri i te marena, ka taea e ētahi te puta mai i te mamae me te kaha ake i mua. Mōu, he iti noa ngā mea hei whakaaroaro māu hei āwhina i a koe ki te whakatau:

• Te kaha me te hiahia o tāu tāne ki te whakaae i te kawenga mō āna mahi. Me whakaae ia ki tāna i mahi ai, kaua e whakakorekore i te hapa, me te kore e whakapae i tētahi atu mea.
• He nui te kaha o ngā hoa e rua ki te whakapūmau i te angitu o tētahi hononga i muri i te tinihanga. Me noho kōrua, me whakaae ki ngā raruraru kē atu i roto i tō kōrua marena, me te whakamārama anō hoki i te tūranga i mahia e kōrua i roto i aua raruraru. Ko te tikanga, me whai kōrero pono, me te ngāwari hoki tēnei. He mea tēnei kua rite koe ki te mahi?
• Kia maumahara kāore he kōwhiringa tika, he kōwhiringa hē rānei i konei. He kōwhiringa noa iho e pai ana ki a koe.
• Ka tino taunaki atu ahau kia kōrero koe ki tētahi kaiwhakaora/kaitohutohu mō te marena nā te āhua me te uaua o tō kōrua whanaungatanga. Ka taea e tētahi tohunga te āwhina i a kōrua mā te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero me te hanga whakawhirinaki, me te mārama ki te tūnga o kōrua mō te whakapau kaha ki te huri me te huarahi hei anga atu i konei. Ka taea e tētahi tohunga te whakarato i tētahi tirohanga kore whakaaro, he tirohanga takawaenga mō ngā raruraru o tō kōrua marena.
• Whakaarohia te whai i tētahi ratonga tohutohu whaiaro, i tētahi rongoā rānei māu ake hei āwhina i a koe ki te whakatau he aha tāu e hiahia ana ki te mahi, he aha ngā take kei muri i tēnā, me ngā mea e hiahiatia ana e koe i tēnei wā tonu kia pai ai te noho, kia angitu ai hoki tō marena.
• Kaua e mangere ki te whakapuaki i ō hiahia ki tō tāne – ahakoa he wāhi, he wā rānei e hiahiatia ana, he whakamarie rānei.
• Whakatakotoria ngā tumanakohanga me ngā rohe ki tō hoa tāne mō ngā mea e hiahiatia ana e kōrua i roto i te marena, ā, tirohia mēnā ka taea e te tangata kē te whakarato i ngā mea e hiahiatia ana e kōrua.
• Rapua te tautoko kare ā-roto, ā-ringa hoki, mai i te hunga e whakawhirinaki ana koe ki a rātou hei hunga e whai whakaaro nui ana ki ōu painga.

Mō te murunga hara i a ia, he kōwhiringa whaiaro te murunga hara. Kāore e taea te akiaki i a koe ki te mahi. Nāu te whakatau mō te murunga hara i a ia, kāore rānei. Heoi, i mua i tō whakatau, kia tino mōhio koe ki te "take" i whiriwhiri ai koe ki te muru i a ia. Hei murunga hara i a ia, me mahi ia i ēnei mea:

• Whakaaetia te mamae i pā ki a ia, me te whakapāha pono, me te hiahia ki te whakatika i te hapa
• He wā tēnei hei tukatuka me te nakunaku i ēnei mea katoa. Kia manawanui ki a koe anō, kaua hoki e akiaki i a koe ki te whakaputa i tētahi momo kare ā-roto.
• Me whakarērea e koe te riri e puritia ana e koe mai i ngā mahi o mua me ngā mahi o nāianei. Ka roa pea tēnei, nō reira kaua e whakaroa.

Pānui e pā ana: Kua murua e au te hara o taku tāne, engari kāore tonu ahau i te mārie

FAQs

Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.

Tirohia ta maatau Tukanga Etita

Tutaki ki ta maatau Poari Arotake

Tiri Urupare

He aha ō urupare?

×

āwhina Pūrongohia he Hapa He mea anō (kōrerohia mai he aha te horopaki)

Tuku