Kwa ena, chikondi ndi kudzipereka ndi kuika patsogolo winayo kuti awone iwo akukhalabe osangalala. Kwa ena, chikondi ndi ulendo wamba womwe umagawidwa pamodzi popanda kuyembekezera. Ochepa amaganiza kuti ntchito yododometsa ya pheromones ndi kukopa kwakuthupi ndizomwe zimatsimikizira chikondi. Koma nthawi yabwino chilankhulo chachikondi chimasiyana ndi matanthauzo onsewa, chifukwa chimakondwerera chikondi kudzera limodzi.
Palibe amene adafika pakutanthauzira kokwanira kwa chikondi. Kuyambira ndakatulo kupita ku mafilimu mpaka kugwedezeka m’kalasi mpaka mnyamata amene munam’konda kwambiri m’giredi lachisanu ndi chimodzi, chikondi chimakhala ndi maonekedwe ndi maonekedwe amene sangafotokozedwe. Komanso, iwo ndi osiyana kwa aliyense. Koma chifukwa cha ntchito ya Dr. Gary Chapman, chikondi ndi mafotokozedwe athu akhoza kukhala m'magulu angapo.
Kodi Chinenero Chachikondi cha Nthawi Yabwino Ndi Chiyani?
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Dr. Gary Chapman ndi mlembi ndi mlangizi amene anapanga zilankhulo zazikulu zisanu zachikondi zomwe anthu amazikonda ndikuziyankha. Chilankhulo chathu chachikondi chimatsimikizira momwe timaonera chikondi, zomwe timachita kuti tizichikonda, komanso momwe timaperekera ndikuchilandira.
Nthawi zina, pamene pali kusagwirizana kwa ziyembekezo mu ubale wanu kapena mkangano umayamba chifukwa mwamuna wanu sanakupezereni kalikonse pachikumbutso chanu chaka chino, ndizotheka kuti zilankhulo zanu zachikondi zingakhale zosiyana. Zingakhale zonse zokhudza njira zogwirika zosonyezera chikondi kwa wina ndi mnzake kapena njira ina yolankhulirana zokonda zanu.
Chilankhulo chachikondi cha nthawi yabwino ndi chimodzi mwa zilankhulo zisanu zachikondi zomwe anthu amakonda kuyamikira kapena kupereka chikondi. Zikutanthauza kuti munthu amaona kuti kukhala ndi nthawi yocheza nanu n’kofunika kwambiri komanso kuti akudziweni kuposa china chilichonse. Choncho, ngati mwamuna wanu anaiwala kukubweretserani mphatso, musamuchitire chipongwe. Chifukwa chingakhale chakuti amayamikira chinenero chachikondi cha nthawi yabwino kuposa chinenero chachikondi cholandira. N’kutheka kuti iye ankaganiza kuti nthawi yocheza ndi inuyo ndi yabwino kwambiri kuposa kukugulirani mphatso.
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Zizindikiro Chinenero Chanu Chachikondi Ndi Nthawi Yabwino
Mwachidule, chinenero chachikondi cha nthawi yabwino ndi pamene okondedwa amasangalala kukhala pamodzi popanda zosokoneza nthawi zonse monga kugwiritsa ntchito foni yanu, kuonera TV, kumvetsera nyimbo, ndi zina zotero. Ndi awiri okha omwe amathera nthawi yabwino ali ndi wina ndi mzake, kaya ndikukambirana bwino pa chakudya chamadzulo, kuphika pamodzi chakudya, kupukusa pabedi, kapena kukumbatirana pambuyo pogonana.
Chilankhulo chachikondi cha nthawi yabwino chimayang'ana pa kugwirizana ndi mnzanu komanso kulimbikitsa ubale wanu ndi iwo. Ndi kumvetserana wina ndi mnzake ndi kukambirana zakukhosi kwanu. Ikuchita zinthu zing'onozing'ono pamodzi monga kukwera galimoto, kutenga ayisikilimu m'sitolo yapafupi, kupita kokagula zinthu, kapena koyenda m'mphepete mwa nyanja. Ngati simunathe kudziwa chilankhulo chanu chachikondi, nazi zizindikiro zingapo zokuthandizani kumvetsetsa:
- Mumapatsa mnzanuyo chidwi chonse, chosagawanika akafuna kukamba zinazake
- Nthawi zonse mumapeza nthawi yocheza ndi mnzanuyo ndipo mumakhumudwa ngati sakupezeka mokwanira
- Kuwononga nthawi komanso kugwirizana ndi mnzanu ndikofunika kwambiri kwa inu kuposa kulandira mphatso
- Mumadana nazo pamene simukumva kumva kapena kukumvetsani muubwenzi
- Mumakhumudwa pamene masiku kapena zochitika zomwe munakonza ndi mnzanu zayimitsidwa
- Nthawi yanu ndi bwenzi lanu ndiye chinthu chofunikira kwambiri paubwenzi
Chofunika kwambiri, chilankhulo chachikondi cha nthawi yabwino chimakhudza momwe mumamvera pamene mnzanu ali ndi inu. Kodi mukulabadira zosowa zawo? Kodi mukumvera zomwe akunena? Kodi mumamva ndikukondedwa? Kodi mumalankhulana bwino? Kugwiritsa ntchito nthawi yabwino ndikudziwana bwino komanso kuyesetsa kumanga ubale wolimba.
Malingaliro ndi Zitsanzo za Chiyankhulo cha Nthawi Yabwino - Zinthu Zoyenera Kuchita Pamodzi
Mnzathu wina, yemwe sakufuna kutchulidwa dzina, anati: “Ine ndi chibwenzi changa tinkasangalala kuthera nthawi yabwino pamodzi.
Ngati mukuganiza kuti inu kapena mnzanuyo mukutsamira kwambiri ku chilankhulo chachikondi cha nthawi yabwino, ndizokongola. Kuti mukhale wapadera kwambiri, pali malingaliro ambiri omwe mungalowemo kuti mukhale ndi nthawi yopindulitsa limodzi ndikulola kuti ubale wanu ukule bwino. Chifukwa chake popanda kupitilira apo, tiyeni tilowe mumalingaliro abwino achilankhulo chachikondi.
1. Pangani chakudya kuyambira pachiyambi pamodzi kuti mukhale ndi nthawi yabwino muubwenzi
Ayi, simukuyenera kukhala chef kuti mukonze izi. Pali zambiri mapulogalamu angapo zomwe zingakuthandizeni kupeza maphikidwe osavuta, osangalatsa, komanso ofunikira kwambiri, adzakubweretsani pafupi. Kotero ngati inu nonse mumakonda chakudya monga momwe mumakondera kukhala ndi wina ndi mzake, ndiye yesani ichi tsiku lina.
Sankhani Lamlungu masana aulesi kuti muphike kufalitsa konse kapena mungodzipangira sipaghetti mutatha tsiku lalitali kuntchito. Chilichonse chomwe chingakhale, chofunikira ndichakuti nonse muli kukhitchini limodzi mukukwapula chikondi komanso chokoma!
2. Pitirizani kukwera limodzi
Izi ndi za munthu yemwe ali ndi chilankhulo chachikondi cha nthawi yabwino komanso amakonda masewera olimbitsa thupi mwachilengedwe. Chomwe chili ndi kukwera maulendo ndikuti palibe zododometsa. Pamene mukukwera phirilo, zonse zomwe zikuzungulirani ndi mpweya woyera, malingaliro ochititsa chidwi, ndi munthu amene mumamukonda kwambiri. Choncho, ikani kumbali zonsezo zifukwa zolimbitsa thupi zoseketsa ndi kumanga nsapato zako.
Ichi ndi chimodzi mwa zitsanzo zabwino za nthawi yachikondi zomwe maanja ambiri amapanga chizolowezi. Amakhulupirira kufunikira kogawana nthawi limodzi kwinaku akutuluka thukuta. Ndibwino kwa thupi lanu, malingaliro anu, ndi ubale wanu ngati chilankhulo chachikondi nthawi yabwino ndi yanu.
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3. Amveni akumamwa khofi
Ngati mnzanuyo ndi mthandizi wa khalidwe nthawi chikondi chinenero, ndiye iwo mwina amaona kuti anamva ndi anazindikira ndi inu zofunika kwambiri kuposa china chilichonse chimene mumawachitira. Inde, pali njira zambiri kusonyeza chikondi koma kungokhala kwa iwo n’kumene amaona kuti n’kofunika kwambiri paubwenziwo.
Chifukwa chake, kuti muwadabwitse ndikuwawonetsa kuti mumawakonda, ikani pamalo awo ndi kapu ya mowa wawo womwe amawakonda ndikucheza nawo. Iwo amayamikira njira imeneyi kuposa inu kuwatumizira iwo meme oseketsa kuti asangalatse iwo pakati pa tsiku.
4. Ikani mafoni anu kutali mukakhala pamodzi
Mwa zilankhulo zonse zachikondi, nthawi yabwino mwina ndiyovuta kwambiri. Zonse zomwe muyenera kuchita kuti mnzanuyo amve kukondedwa ndikukhala nawo. Popeza mwamenyedwa kale, mwina sichinthu chovuta kuchita. Koma kuti mupite patsogolo kwambiri ndikuwapatsa chidwi chanu, ikani foni yanu kutali mukakhala pamodzi.
Ngakhale zingawoneke zovuta mukamawerenga koyamba, chifukwa tonsefe ndife akapolo aukadaulo, sizovuta mukakhala ndi munthu yemwe muli. kugwa mchikondi ndi. Choncho lekani kudera nkhawa abwana anu kapena amayi anu kapenanso wokongoletsa wanu. Ingowapatsani ola limodzi la kudzikonda kwanu kwathunthu ndikugwiritsa ntchito nthawi yabwino paubwenzi.
5. Pitani ulendo wautali mukatha kudya
Chifukwa chake mwangotenga theka la lendi ya mwezi umodzi mukudya chakudya chamadzulo pamalo abwino kwambiri mumzindawu. Ngakhale kuti izi zimayamikiridwa, kodi mungatani kuti mukweze zinthu? Chabwino, chinthu chachikulu za nthawi khalidwe chikondi chinenero ndi kuti mulibe nthawi zonse kuti apereke chikondi kapena onetsani munthu amene mumamukonda. Mwachitsanzo, m'malo molunjika kunyumba kukagona kapu yausiku (ndi zina) mutatha kudya, bwanji nonse awiri osatuluka mu lesitilanti ndikuyenda kulikonse kumene mphepo imakutengerani?
Pamene mukuwagwira dzanja ndi kuwazungulira mzindawo, tikukulonjezani kuti adzamva kukondedwa ndi kukondedwa monga kale. Ndi izi, mutha kuwawonetsa kuti nthawi kapena malo zilibe kanthu. Chofunikira ndichakuti awiri muli limodzi. Ndi malingaliro osavuta koma okhudza nthawi yachikondi a chilankhulo, mutha kupangitsa kuti SO yanu ikhale yokondedwa komanso kuyamikiridwa.
6. Onetsani chilankhulo chanu chachikondi cha nthawi yabwino poyenda panjira
Mphepo ya tsitsi lanu, nyimbo zogwedezeka, ndi chikondi cha moyo wanu pambali panu, izi siziri pafupi ndi paradaiso. Makamaka ngati mukuyang'ana malingaliro abwino a nthawi ya chinenero chachikondi, tikukulimbikitsani kukonzekera izi posachedwa.
Kungogawana ulendo wautali wagalimoto ndi mnzanu kungakhale kochiritsira kwambiri kwa inu nonse ngati mukufuna kumasula ndikutsitsimutsanso. Valani nyimbo zomwe mumakonda, ikani zokhwasula-khwasula ndi zakumwa zoziziritsa kukhosi, ndikupita ku B&B yapafupi kuti mukakhale ndi sabata yokongola.
7. Kukumbatirana kwambiri mukatha kugonana
Kugonana kwabwino ndikofunikira paubwenzi uliwonse. Kukopeka kwathu kwa wina ndi mzake ndikofunika mofanana ndi chiyanjano chathu chanzeru kapena mgwirizano wamaganizo. Koma ntchitoyo ikatha, musamangoyang’ana TV kapena kuyamba kudzipangira tokhwasula-khwasula. Yesetsani kukhalapo ndi okondedwa anu ndikuyankhulana ndi pilo.
Mukatha kugonana, mwina awirinu mumakhala pachiwopsezo komanso mumamasuka kuposa kale. Kotero musataye mwayi uwu kuti mupindule kwambiri ndi nthawi yabwino yachikondi ndi iwo. Muzisisita tsitsi lawo, kuwapsompsona phewa, ndi kuwakumbatira.
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8. Kuti mukhale ndi nthawi yambiri yaubwenzi, pangani mwambo wa tsiku ndi tsiku
Pazitsanzo zonse za chilankhulo chachikondi cha nthawi yabwino, iyi iyenera kugwira ntchito bwino kwambiri. Mwina inu nonse mumakhala moyo wosiyana kwambiri komanso wotanganidwa kwambiri, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kulumikizana masana ndikupatsana nthawi yomwe inu nonse mukuyenera. Zikatero, zingakhale zothandiza kuluka mnzanu muzochita zanu mwa kupanga mwambo wa tsiku ndi tsiku mozungulira iwo.
Limodzi mwamalingaliro abwino achilankhulo chachikondi pankhaniyi ndikuti nonse mumayimba foni yamavidiyo tsiku lililonse ndikudya nkhomaliro limodzi koma pafupifupi. Zomwezo zikhoza kuchitika pa khofi yanu yam'mawa. Ngakhale zitakhala mphindi 5 zokha, izi chibwenzi chenicheni zitha kupanga kusiyana konse padziko lapansi kuwonetsa munthu yemwe mumamukonda mukamazichita tsiku ndi tsiku.
9. Kuvina pamodzi pabalaza
Zikumveka ngati chinachake chimene mungachite m'chaka chachiwiri cha sekondale koma simunakalamba kwambiri kuti musavine ndi amene mumamukonda. Kuti muthe kutulutsa nthunzi kapena kungosangalala, ponyani nyimbo zomwe mumakonda ndikuvina mnyumbamo. Ichi ndi chimodzi mwa zokongola mwangwiro zinthu zoti muchite ndi chibwenzi chanu kunyumba.
Mu zitsanzo za chilankhulo chachikondi cha nthawi yabwino monga izi, simuyenera kuyankhula. Kungokhala kwanu komweko komanso chilankhulo chanu zimagwira ntchito kuti mnzanuyo amve kuti ndi wapadera komanso wokondedwa. Ngakhale corny zingawonekere, tikupangira kuti muphulike.
10. Auzeni zambiri za inu nthawi iliyonse
Kugwira ntchito pa nthawi yanu yabwino chinenero chachikondi kungakhale chinthu chabwino. Koma zonse zimangopita pachabe ngati simusiya kusamala ndikudziwonetsera nokha kwa munthu wina. Muzu wokhala ndi nthawi yopindulitsa ndi aliyense wagona pakuwathandiza kuti akudziweni ndikuyeseranso kukumvetsetsani.
Kotero ziribe kanthu kuti ndi maulendo angati apamsewu kapena nthawi ya khofi yomwe mumatenga kuchokera kuntchito kuti mukacheze ndi mnzanu, malingaliro abwino a chinenero cha chikondi awa adzagwira ntchito mukawatsegulira. Yesani kufunsana 'mundidziwe' mafunso kapena ingololani kuti zokambirana zichitike momwe ziyenera kukhalira, koma onetsetsani kuti nthawi yomwe mumakhala limodzi ndi yofunika kwambiri kwa inu komanso moyo wanu wachikondi.
Pachidziwitso chimenecho, ndibwino kuti mutsirize mndandanda wa zitsanzo za chinenero chachikondi cha nthawi yabwino kuti muyese ndi mnzanuyo. Musanayambe kudumphira m'mutu, kumbukirani kuti musamavutike. Wokondedwa wanu akhoza kukhala ndi chinenero chosiyana cha chikondi ndipo panjira, mukhoza kuzindikira kuti mwina inunso mumatero. Chilichonse chomwe chingakhale, mudzachipeza pamapeto pake. Koma chimenecho sichinali chifukwa choti musamakhudzidwe kwambiri mutagonana kapena kuvina m’chipinda chanu chochezera!
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Bwanji Ngati Chinenero Chanu Ndi Chiyankhulo Chanzanu Chili Chosiyana?
Choyamba, musachite mantha. Ndi zachilendo kuti anthu okwatirana azikhala ndi zilankhulo ziwiri zachikondi. Kuposa kulankhula chinenero chachikondi chofanana, m’pofunika kuti mumvetse chinenero cha chikondi cha wina ndi mnzake. Sizophweka koma ngati onse awiri akufuna kukhala pamodzi ndipo ali okonzeka kupita mtunda wowonjezera, ndiye kuti sizingatheke. Kukhala ndi chilankhulo chosiyana chachikondi ndikwabwino koma ndikofunikira kumvetsetsa kusiyana kwake, apo ayi mutha kukhala osungulumwa komanso okwiya ndikuyika ubale wanu pachiwopsezo.
Muyenera kumvetsetsa zomwe zili zofunika kwa aliyense wa inu. Muyenera kukhala okhoza kulekanitsa zosowa zanu ndi zofuna za mnzanuyo kuti muthe kuwapatsa zomwe akufuna, ndi kuwakhulupirira kuti akwaniritse zosowa zanu ndi zofuna zanu. Kuti mukwaniritse izi, kulumikizana ndikofunikira. Mudzayeneradi kutero lankhulani bwino ndi mnzanu kulimbitsa ubale wanu ndikuyandikira limodzi. Anthu okwatirana ayenera kukambirana zomwe akufuna kuchokera kwa wina ndi mzake komanso ubale.
Lingaliro ndikudzimva kukhala wofunika, wolemekezeka, komanso wotetezeka mu ubale womwe muyenera kulankhulana ndikukhala ndi nthawi yabwino pamodzi koma panthawi imodzimodziyo, perekani wina ndi mzake malo okwanira kuti akule ngati munthu payekha. Yamikirani zinthu zing'onozing'ono zomwe wokondedwa wanu amakuchitirani ngakhale sizomwe mumakonda kapena momwe mungasonyezere chikondi ndi chikondi. Lemekezani kusiyana kwa wina ndi mzake. Mutha kulumikizana ndikupeza zomwe mungagwirizane nazo.
Ibibazo
Pali malingaliro ambiri a nthawi yachikondi omwe mungayesere. Kukhala tcheru kwambiri ndi kumvetsera kwambiri ndi theka la nkhondo yomwe yapambana. Apatseni nthawi yanu, yang'anani mozama m'maso mwawo, ndikukonzekera zochitika zomwe mumafika ponyalanyaza dziko lonse ndikukambirana wina ndi mnzake.
Gary Chapman, m'buku lake Zinenero 5 Zachikondi: Chinsinsi Chokonda Chomwe Chimakhala Chokhalitsa, analankhula za zilankhulo zisanu zachikondi zimene anthu amagwiritsira ntchito posonyezana chikondi—mawu otsimikizira, nthaŵi yabwino, kulandira mphatso, ntchito zautumiki, ndi kukhudza thupi.
Mwa kuwapangitsa kumva kuti mumawakonda komanso kuwakonda. Osanyalanyaza mafoni awo kapena mameseji. Onetsetsani kuti akudziwa kuti mumakhala nawo nthawi zonse ngati akukufunani. Ayenera kudalira inu mokwanira kuti adalira inu.
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